Tag: leading

Trip Tricks: Mission Trip Interview Tips

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We just closed out our mission trip applications for this summer and are thrilled with the amount of students and leaders who want to serve this year. Part of our methodology for summer programming is to lean into mission trips as it correlates with our vision of disciplemaking.

An integral part of our application process is sitting down for an interview with each student who signs up. We discuss their application, work through their references, get to know them better, and discern if this trip is the right trip for them.

This process helps to ensure that the team going on the trip can work together, mesh well, and have the right philosophy for the trip. It also allows the trip leader to know their team, to begin to see how the team will integrate, and to begin to see pressure points that may develop.

Another aspect of this interview is that we are able to ascertain where students are at in their faith. I am a firm believer that mission trips are not just for the students who have it all “figured out” or even just for Christians.

Mission trips can be missional to the students who are going to serve. But in walking through an application that should have pertinent faith questions, you can begin to understand where each student is in their journey with Jesus.

In preparation for each of the interviews, I would highly suggest the following before you sit down with your student:

1. Read the application and take notes.

Write down any questions you have, underscore things you wish to touch on, and make notes about any themes, challenges, or encouragements that you see. Be prepared to follow up on those notes during your interview with the student.

2. Pray for the student.

Part of our application asks our students to list ways we can pray for them. These requests are then shared with our church through prayer cards when we do fundraising, but it also provides a way for you to pray for your students before, during, and after the interview process.

Take time to not just pray for the requests they shared in the application, but also ask if there are any other requests that they may have when you sit down for the interview.

3. Prepare any guidance or follow up that will need to be done.

One thing we ask each of our applicants to do is share their testimony. Sometimes we need to offer guidance in writing the testimony out or even in helping them to understand what their testimony is. Whether it’s the testimony or other guidance, be prepared to speak into specific areas during the interview.

4. Follow up with references if needed.

Part of our application process involves students getting a parental and personal reference. If concerns are raised by their references, or if there are specific aspects that warrant follow up, make sure to do so before the interview so you’re adequately prepared.

Proper preparation for interviews will help to ensure they go well and you are building a unified team that will work well together. Being proactive and intentional in the interview process helps you to lead well and instill trust in your students as they prepare for the trip.

Quick Tip: Always Have a Wellness Policy

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It’s wintertime and that means illnesses are abounding. I’m not a scientist by any scope of the term, but I’ve worked with students long enough to know that this time of year sees a large uptick of sickness. There’s colds, stomach bugs, the flu, Covid, allergies, and more.

In the area we serve, doctors have been seeing a very large increase in illnesses and in how quickly they are spreading. Schools are seeing droves of students missing classes. Trips and gatherings allow for illnesses to spread quickly. And illnesses are not always being actualized until symptoms appear, allowing for many people to get sick faster.

The years 2020-2021 taught us a lot of things, and one of them was the necessity of having a wellness policy. Covid forced us to think about social distancing, how to better cover our coughs and sneezes, the increased importance of sanitary practices, and how important it is to stay home when sick and not spread illnesses. But the reality is Covid isn’t the only illness that can and will spread rapidly, especially in scenarios where large groups are gathered together.

As we began to reassess and think differently about how we did ministry post-Covid, an area we realized needed to be updated was our wellness policy. We decided to call it a “wellness policy” rather than “sick policy” because wellness highlights what we are seeking to achieve and it is more positive sounding. A sick policy seems punitive while wellness points towards a safe place where even immunocompromised individuals can attend.

So what does this look like? Well, I’ll be honest with you and share two key pieces about a wellness policy: it may change over time, and it will also depend on your context. Let me explain both of these in a little more detail.

A wellness policy may change as you understand more about the illnesses you are dealing with and how that pertains to your ministry and its setting. For instance, our wellness policy was originally focused on multiple symptoms but we adjusted that when we understood people could be asymptomatic. So we went more broad than narrow on our policy to work within that understanding.

Your context will also help determine how you shape your wellness policy. If you live in a setting where you can conduct ministry outdoors for a large part of the year, you will probably have a bit more freedom in how you shape the policy. If you’re indoors in a smaller environment that will also shape how you purposefully engage this policy. Another thing to consider is allergens and how prone your area of the country is to them as their symptoms can sometimes manifest in the same way other illnesses can.

So understanding your context and present setting should help you in shaping how your policy looks. I stated earlier that we went simple with ours as we believe clarity is kindness and simplicity helps us be direct and understandable. We focused on a few key points for our policy and have shaped it in this way: “If you feel sick stay home. We want you to rest up and feel better, as well as prevent any one else from catching anything.”

We have an addendum for Covid which states, “If you test positive for Covid, please adhere to the following guideline: you must stay home (i.e. away from the church) until you are symptom free for 24 hours without a fever.” We also encourage everyone to follow good hygiene practices.

These simple statements have not only helped our group stay relatively healthy throughout the years, but it’s also given people permission to take a sick day. This policy applies to our leaders who, like yours, are dedicated and wanted to always be present even to their own detriment. But now they are given the freedom to stay home and get better.

This policy is not guaranteed to prevent any type of sickness, nor stop the spreading of anything. But it does help in keeping our people safe and provides clear communication.

In months where illnesses are rapidly spreading, having a wellness policy helps you to care well for you people by giving them loving direction and seeking to ensure a safe and healthy place for your entire community.

Quick Tip: Have a Sick Plan

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Have you ever been sick on youth group night or Sunday morning? Has the flu surprised you the day of youth group? Have you experienced prolonged illness that kept you out of service for a good amount of time?

The longer I serve in ministry, especially student ministry, the more convinced I become that having a sick plan is a necessity. Trips can allow for illnesses to spread quickly. Winter months see a drastic increase in cold, flu, Covid, and other illnesses.

And then there’s always the unexpected sickness or health concern that creeps up. Family members may get sick and need help at home. And if this is the case, how do we handle those moments when we can’t be at our ministry? Is there a game plan? Do your volunteers know what the plan is? How is that information communicated to your leaders, students, and families?

Today I want to help you think through these moments by providing tangible steps you can take to address these concerns. This isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach, but more of an à la carte approach where you can pick and choose the steps that work best for you and your ministry.

Take a sick day.

Sometimes we just want to work through whatever illness we are wrestling with, but that’s a poor approach to take. Showing up sick can put others at risk, it depletes you even more, and it communicates to your team that it’s okay to show up sick, which can lead to illnesses being spread quickly and more often. So take a sick day, rest, recoup, and come back when you’re healthy.

Have a backup teacher.

One of the truths we must come to terms with is that our programs and ministries can and will exist without us. It’s a hard truth to reckon with, but a truth nonetheless. For many years I wrestled with this and convinced myself of the lie that the ministries I oversaw couldn’t exist without me.

It took a mental health leave for me to see that these ministries will not only exist without me, but can flourish as well. And I saw this truth through our leaders who stepped up and utilized their gifts. I became much more aware that I have gifted communicators on my team and I should be empowering them to serve. One of them has actually come to me and said, “If you ever need to bail, for any reason, I’ll have a lesson ready to go.”

This taught me so much and I want to encourage you to seek out and have backup teachers ready for when you can’t be present. No, it won’t be in the series you’re doing and no it won’t be what you had prepared. But God will use those individuals and His Word to help your students grow and flourish. So find different people who can step in for you when you’re sick (and a bonus tip: use them even when you are not sick and watch how different voices resonate with your students).

Build a communication plan.

This is important across your ministry as a whole, but having a communication plan for illness is key. Who will you tell? Who gets told first? What’s the communication say? Is it intentional, informational, or both? Drafting a plan for how communication goes out, to whom it goes out to, and what it says is key.

My mentality is to start with my leaders because they help in communicating any change to their students. They have more established communication lines so it makes sense to start there. We then email families and post across our media channels.

Our emails contain information that is needed about any change or cancelation, but they also provide intentional touch points. We provide ways for families to connect like cooking or baking together with recipes, or watching a movie and discussing it. We highlight ways to engage in worship, and we even point to a passage in Scripture that they could discuss.

Now all of this sounds great, but when you’re sick no one wants to spend the time writing all of this out. So prepare it ahead of time and have it ready to go when needed.

Have a plan for Sunday morning and youth group evenings.

As you think about the two prior points, it’s also important to have a plan for how your programming will function when you are not present. Have you taught people how to set things up? Have you shared your expectations? Do people know what to do in different scenarios like if a student gets hurt or if there’s a fire alarm?

Often times youth workers handle their own set up and know the ins and outs of tech, lighting, and how to open and close up the church; but do the people filling in for you know how to do all of that? Training, equipping, and empowering others to handle this means building a plan for them and helping them understand that plan.

At the end of the day, there will be times you are not present at youth group or church. That is okay, and you should be encouraged to take sick days and vacation time. But how will your ministry do without you? Is it build upon you and your identity (or perhaps is your identity wrapped up in it), or is it sustainable because it’s built around Christ? Have you empowered others to lead in your absence? Do you have a plan for when you are not there?

By preparing ahead, you are setting your team and ministry up for success. Take the necessary steps to be proactive rather than reactive and watch your ministry flourish even if you’re sick.

Trip Tricks: Post Trip Follow-Up

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It’s the end of your trip. You’re preparing your group to head home. You and your team are saying your goodbyes to camp staff, missionaries, and new friends. You’re taking group pictures, thinking about the ride or flight home. And when you finally get back, you can’t wait for those first few minutes of silence and stillness before heading home to see your family, take a nice long shower, and sleep in your own bed.

Sound familiar? I know I tend to feel all of those things during the end of our trips. But what about intentional follow-up with your students?

Students usually encounter Jesus in new and refreshing ways during trips and come away with a renewed desire to follow Him and grow deeper in their faith. The question we need to ask ourselves is this: are we intentionally leveraging and engaging in these moments to best steward and grow our students’ relationship with Jesus?

In my early years of student ministry I didn’t always focus on this. And it became painfully obvious that my students rode the “camp high” and then began to fizzle out as they simply went back to their old habits. But that doesn’t have to be the case.

We can avoid the “camp high” by helping our students to intentionally continue engaging in their relationship with Jesus and continuing in community with believers. We can help them see that there is more than simply settling for the mundane and typical life this world offers, and instead show them how amazing and grand it can be with Jesus.

One of the ways we can do this is by offering intentional steps our students can take to engage their faith and help them with follow up. Here’s what it looks like for us.

We sit our group down all together for ten to fifteen minutes at the end of the trip before we load up to go home and we take time to talk through intentional steps they can take.

We talk about continuing to be in biblical community, engaging with spiritual rhythms, next steps in their faith journey like baptism, joining a summer mission trip, serving in the church and their community, and sharing their story with others. Each of these steps are designed to eliminate the myth of the “camp high” and to help students continue to grow and flourish in their faith.

We also tried a new approach this year where we gave postcards to our small group leaders that were designed to give students a means of responding to their experience on the retreat. We realize that as our ministry has grown, the large group gatherings at the end are great, but with a discipleship format, having small group leaders engage in a different setting allows us to help our students grow and take steps of faith. The postcards can be fairly simple and should included space for contact information, and then some tangible check boxes. The check boxes could include things like, I followed Jesus, I want to get baptized, I want to serve, and I have questions.

We also try to be intentional in providing pathways for students to take after the trip that will help them grow in their faith. After our winter retreat we launch our summer trip sign-ups a week after returning home. We challenge students to serve by promoting opportunities during youth group in the weeks following our trips. We also try to provide thoughtful and intentional ways for students to share their stories throughout the year.

Providing intentional opportunities for follow-up with your students allows for continued growth and development of their faith. It also helps students to understand that their faith doesn’t simply ride the rollercoaster of jumping from event to event but is an ongoing journey they get to be a part of with Jesus. It also helps to ensure that upcoming generations don’t walk away from their faith after high school, but instead are committed to an ongoing transformative relationship with their Savior.

Quick Tip: Empower Your Students

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This past week we had our student ministry Christmas party. It was a ton of fun with lots of sugar, activities and games, worship, and of course a white elephant gift exchange.

But none of this would have been possible without our students. Not just because that’s what the focus of student ministry is, but because our students are in charge of our worship team and tech team.

One thing you should know about me is that I am not musical at all. I can’t play an instrument, I’m not a great singer (some may say I shouldn’t sing at all), I can’t mix audio, and I’ve only had one basic conducting course way back in undergrad. But really, who conducts in student ministry?

All that to say, I am not the guy to lead and direct our worship and tech ministries. I can have some oversight but even in that capacity my abilities are limited.

A handful of years ago, I met a student who had a passion for running our tech during weekly programming. This student was struggling to find their place and I noticed that they were hanging around our tech setup, so I simply asked if they were interested in helping out. Their eyes about jumped out of their head as they nodded yes!

So jump in they did. But not just in our ministry; they now help on Sunday morning during our worship services and their skill set and intentionality has made our worship services much more intentional.

Two years ago I had a handful of students come tell me they wanted to have worship incorporated in our ministry. I explained that I loved the idea but I couldn’t be the person to facilitate it so they would need to put together teams and run it. They agreed and we are now two years into having intentional moments of worship incorporated at specific times throughout the year.

We have had students who wanted to lead Bible studies in their schools and needed resources and guidance. So we equipped them, trained them, and sent them out. They are now leading multiple Bible studies and prayer groups in their schools and on their sports teams.

I wish I had started doing this sooner because it not only afforded our students an opportunity to step out in their faith and lead, but it also helped our ministry to grow because our students took ownership and became more invested.

When students are empowered and equipped to lead they will do so with boldness and excitement. They will bring others in and make disciples as we have been called to do. It does take time and work to unleash your students in leadership roles, but it’s incredible when they do as you witness God work in powerful ways through them.

At the end of the day our job is to disciple our students in their faith and unleash them to go out into the world with the Gospel. When we release control, and challenge and empower our students, we will see the world changed by the Spirit working through them.

Empowering your students will not only give them ownership and release certain responsibilities from your plate, it will help the Gospel to go forth through a generation that is passionate and sold out for what Christ is doing in and through them. Take a bold step, empower your students and give them the opportunity to flourish and lead as they are discipled and cared for by you and your team.

Quick Tip: Be Willing to Ask for Help

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When it comes to asking for help, how would you rate yourself ? Are you really good at it? Are you someone who just goes at it alone and gets it done no matter the cost to you? Or do you ask others to jump in and help?

Asking for help is not something I’m naturally good at doing. I was raised with the mentality that you do everything on your own because you’re the only person you can rely on. We were the “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” type of family.

Now I could go on about how that’s a flawed type of system and how that very phrase is antithetical to what it means to be a Christ follower, but I won’t. Instead I want to encourage you to be willing to ask for help.

One of my favorite things we get to do in our ministry is host a Christmas party for our leaders. For years I took that responsibility upon myself to plan, decorate, and execute. I would spend countless hours and days and weeks preparing everything.

I’d handle decor, I’d build the schedule, prepare the gifts, purchase and provide the food, handle the emceeing, and of course I’d be the one cleaning up. Did you feel tired just reading that? Did it hit home for you?

When a ministry or job or an event hangs upon one person that’s a problem. What if that one person gets sick? Worse, what if they quit? This builds a culture of personality around a person, not an identity in Christ and that isn’t what we are meant to be doing.

Instead, we should seek help. We should bring others into the process, share the load, empower our people, and remind ourselves that the ministry doesn’t rest upon us but upon Christ.

Shortly after 2020-2021, we had to rethink how we hosted and ran our leader Christmas party. I knew I could no longer run it on my own and had to come to terms with letting go and allowing others to help.

A couple of parents had offered at different points to help, so I figured sending out a request for help would be a good first step. I wrote an email explaining what we had seen God doing over the last year in student ministry, all the ways our leaders had been serving, and outlined the needs and requests.

Our ask of parents was simple: would they provide desserts and appetizers for our leader Christmas party as way to encourage and bless our leaders? I was skeptical the first year we sent this out, but I was pleasantly surprised with the results. We didn’t just have food for the party, but leftovers we sent home with our leader. Even more leftovers were repurposed for our student party the next week.

We have continued to utilize this approach with our families each year, and every year they bless our leaders in abundance. In doing so it alleviates a huge need for that event and allows our team to better engage with our leaders.

It also shows our leaders that our families do see and appreciate them by providing very real and tangible gifts for them. Many families even send cards and notes along that we share with our leaders.

So at the end of the day it isn’t just about asking for food. It is understanding that by asking for help, we can alleviate the pressure we often feel as ministry leaders, bless others by asking for help, and allow other people to have ownership.

Asking for help can at times be difficult, but it is necessary for the longevity of yourself, your ministry, and the church. Bring others in, allow people to utilize their skills and gifts, and build the church and your ministry around Christ. If you do this you will see yourself, your ministry, and your church grow for the better.

Tips for Creating a Winter Weather Policy

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Thanksgiving just happened which means here in Pennsylvania we are officially moving into winter. That means snow is an ever-present reality for our ministry and for many others around the country. While I love the way snow looks when it falls and the beauty of it on the ground, it does compound all of the planning for church and student ministry.

Depending on where you live, your winter weather policy may look different from other parts of the country due to your experience with winter weather. It may take more or less winter weather to cancel or change programming depending on how often you get it and how familiar your area is with that type of weather.

At the end of the day our policies should be designed to make sure we are doing our best to keep our students, leaders, and families safe. This isn’t about having programming but ensuring the safety of those we have been assigned to care for.

Consider following the examples of local schools.

One of the best practices our church has is to watch and see what the local schools are doing when it comes to making decisions for programming and opening/closing the building. If schools cancel evening activities it is probably a good choice to follow suit. If they cancel or have a delayed opening, it gives you time and insight into how you should alter or cancel programming for your ministry.

Reserve the right to make your own decisions.

While we tend to follow the schools’ decisions in our area, we reserve the right to change things on our end if needed. Schools may close for the day because of the way the storm is moving, but we have also seen where it has warmed up and caused all the snow to melt prior to youth group. There’s also the scenario where nothing happens until the latter part of the day which means we need to make a decision based on what’s best for our community.

Always err on the side of caution.

This is one of the big tipping points for our ministry when it comes to making a decision based on weather. I know that there will be times we get it wrong. I may cancel programming because it looks like we will get hammered by a winter storm that does next to nothing. I have canceled due to cold conditions and icy roadways that didn’t turn out to be as bad as expected.

For each time I have canceled programming (whether or not the weather did what was expected) there are always disappointed people who ask me why. Here’s what I always say, “I want to err on the side of caution to ensure the safety and wellbeing of our students, families, and volunteers in all situations and will take the necessary steps to ensure that happens.”

I don’t always get it right, but I will always seek to protect the people under my care and that informs how and when I make decisions to cancel.

Be intentional and clear with communication.

Whenever you decide to cancel, you must make sure you communicate that clearly and in a timely manner. We make our decisions by 2 p.m. so families and leaders see it well before youth group, they have time to switch their plans, and we have had time to track the storm and see what the weather is and will be doing.

We communicate through email and social media, and we text our leaders and ask them to communicate with their small groups because they all have different methods of doing so. We don’t simply say “youth group is cancelled, sorry,” we create intentional emails that do the following:

1. Clearly explain our decision and how we got there.

2. Provide resources and creative ways for families to spend time together including missional opportunities, fun recipes for cooking together, game ideas, and more.

3. We communicate upcoming dates for our ministry and any reminders that families need to know.

4. Recognize that this is a loss for students but also that God wasn’t surprised by this decision and it can be used for families and students to grow closer together.

Once you make a choice stick to it.

This is hugely important because it provides clarity and consistency for your families. Do not flip-flop on decisions and allow your policy to guide your decisions as you move forward each year. By doing this, families and leaders will come to expect consistent and reliable communication that strives to keep everyone safe.

At the end of the day, cancelling programming is a tough decision.

I always feel the pull of the “should I or shouldn’t I,” but at the end of the day, if I look at these steps, it helps me make the decision that keeps everyone safe and is highly intentional. My hope for you is that these steps help to alleviate some of the weight and burden that come with having to make these decisions and that it helps to shape how you do so in meaningful and thoughtful ways.

Don’t Forget to Have Fun with Your Students

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One of my eighth grade guys loves to rub my head. It’s become a running joke that he will try to sneak up on me and rub or pat my head before I notice him.

Many of my other students love to joke about my gray hair and my “advanced” age. Still others will laugh about my weak ankles and knees. And there’s a handful of students who love to point out that my clothing choices tend to repeat themselves.

There are two responses I could have in these situations. One, I could get frustrated with the joking and shut it down. Or two, I could laugh and have fun with my students.

At the end of the day, their joking doesn’t bother me much and it highlights their comfortability with me and our program. I could choose to be a stick-in-the-mud and respond in an authoritarian way, but I know that will not make our program into what we want it to be: a safe place for our students to be themselves and know Jesus.

In our ministry we are clear on boundaries and rules, especially when it comes to how we engage with and treat one another. This means that when things get pushed too far and we respond to it, our students understand that they stepped over the line.

But here’s the thing: we can still have fun within those boundaries. We can still laugh at what our students say and do when they’re trying to be funny. We can chuckle at the immaturity and lack of self awareness. We can be relaxed and laugh at ourselves along with our students. The other side of the coin is that we could take things personally and try to shape the program and interactions in a way that keeps those moments at bay.

I would recommend the former over the latter because it creates a place where students can be authentic and simply be kids. We were all immature in middle school and high school, we all made jokes, we probably all said something a little out of pocket at some point.

As adults, we should remember how we acted and instead of crying foul and trying to just shut things down, we should instead take a moment to laugh and show students how mature adults can engage, have fun, and respond.

When we can have fun alongside of our students, we are showing them that we see them as more than a number or a child to be watched. We are showing them that we truly value and desire intergenerational discipleship relationships. We are highlighting that we can have fun and engage with them while valuing them and not dismissing them because of their age.

These types of moments create safe and healthy environments for students to be themselves, connect with safe adults, and be shepherded towards Jesus as we all take time to have fun together.

Here is my encouragement to you:

1. Allow your students to be students even if it means a little immaturity, random comments, and lack of self awareness.

2. Laugh along with (and sometimes at – of course not in front of them) your students and what they say or do.

3. Don’t take yourself too seriously and be willing to have fun and take a joke or two.

4. Create an environment that values fun and joy for everyone involved.

By incorporating these elements I cannot guarantee that your program will be perfect but that there will be a lot more joy, laughter, and community within your ministry.

Help! I Don’t Know How to Lead Students

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Sometimes in church life we may find ourselves in a role we never dreamed we’d fill. There may be no one else available, or we may feel God pulling us into a space outside our comfort zone. And sometimes, that may be serving in student ministry.

If this is you, or someone you know, let us encourage you/them. Students are amazing and, in our possibly biased opinion, one of the best groups in the church. While working with them may feel overwhelming, we want to encourage you that if you have a heart for students, you can do it.

The reality is that students crave genuine relationships and connection with others. You don’t need to be the cool leader, you just need to be the leader that genuinely cares, shows up, and listens. The best thing you can do is invest consistently in your students by being present, hearing and seeing them, and fostering a safe place for them to be themselves.

So what are some ways you can do this? Take a look at these tips we hope will get you started and help as you continue in this important ministry.

1. Commit to being present.

This doesn’t just mean showing up to every student ministry event, while that is extremely important. Students do need to see you physically present. It also means being mentally present with your students.

You can be mentally present by putting work and life stressors on the back burner and trying not to bring them with you to youth group. You can also make sure to spend your time with the students, not hanging out with other leaders or playing on your phone.

One of the best ways you can show students how important they are is by giving them your undivided attention when you are with them.

2. Actively listen to your students.

Listening is another way to be present. And while we are to guide and shepherd our students, the first thing they need to learn about us is that we are listening to them. This is how we show them that we genuinely care.

Practice active listening by seeking to understand what your students are saying and why, and by asking thoughtful follow-up questions that continue to foster the conversation. Don’t worry about handing out advice and instruction right away, and don’t listen just to give a response. Show students you are someone who will hear them and wants to know what they have to say.

3. Be yourself and don’t fake it.

Students can spot a fake a mile away, they’re naturally good at it. So do yourself a favor and don’t pretend to be something you’re not. Bring your authentic self to youth group and let that person shine.

The reality is not every single student will click with you, and that’s okay. You’re not there to be everyone’s best friend. But students should be able to see and know the real you, that is one of the best ways you can show them that they matter to you. Give students the respect they deserve by being real with them.

4. Have fun.

If you haven’t been around student ministry before, one thing you need to know about students is that they love to have fun. Whether it’s playing 9 Square, hanging out with their friends, playing sports or music at school, getting crafty and creative, or whatever else they enjoy, students are always up for having a good time.

Since your students like to have fun (and because we serve a God who created a world for us to enjoy), we can also have fun with them. It doesn’t mean you have to do all the things, but you can engage and have fun with them. Laugh, enjoy your time with them, play as you are able, and celebrate with them.

Having fun shows your students that you’re relatable, willing to meet them where they are at, and someone who desires to share life with them. And it can show them that you don’t take yourself too seriously.

If you want to dig a little deeper into leading students, we invite you to check out more of our blog posts! Here are a few to get you started:

Leading Students Well in Chaotic Times

Quick Tip: Giving Students Ownership

Leading Small Groups: Self-Guided Discussion

8 Keys to Building a Successful Student Ministry

Are You Asking the Right Questions?

Healthy Ways to Disconnect

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Let me ask you a question: when was the last time you took a break? How about a true weekend without work? When was the last time you took a vacation and truly felt relaxed, at peace, and didn’t think about work?

Please understand that I am not trying to cast condemnation or criticism here. I’m in the same boat. For years, I always had my phone next to me and was ready for the next issue to arise. Every time it buzzed I feared what was happening.

It took a good couple of days to breathe and truly enjoy being on vacations. Weekends were rough because I was always thinking about what was to come. It was always hard to shut off my mind after a standard work day let alone after youth group.

Feel like you’re in the same boat? I think for a lot of us in ministry we feel that weight. We feel the complexity of working hard at our jobs and ministering to students, families, and the church, but also the added weight of a deeply personal call to shepherd and care for the people of God.

When you put all those things together they can feel heavy; they are heavy. And if you don’t put appropriate breaks, rhythms, refreshment, and space between those things and your own personal life and spiritual development, you will burn out. You will struggle with anxiety, depression, resentment, bitterness, and more. You will find distance growing between you and your family. Your family will struggle with loving the church because of what they see it doing to you.

And ultimately you will find yourself serving the church of God and not God, Himself; you will create an idol. And yes, even good things can become idols because they are not meant to be the ultimate thing in our lives.

If all of that is true—and believe me it is because I’m proof of it—what do we need to be doing differently? Today, I want to share a handful of practices I have begun to implement in my life that have been extremely helpful in disconnecting.

Bring others in.

If you’re feeling overworked, resentful, burnt out, or if the joy is gone, you need to bring people in. We are crafted for community and so often we go through life alone. Instead, we need to bring others into our lives and share honestly about what is happening.

The sooner you bring people in and are transparent with things, the better equipped you’ll be to heal and disconnect well. By bringing others in, it allows you to have accountability and a network to help you disconnect and establish boundaries.

Be honest about what you’re feeling.

I think when you work in ministry it is easy to mask how you’re feeling and to pretend like you have everything under control. That type of mentality can easily lead to isolation, frustration, and hurt which often times leads us to go through life and ministry alone.

That way of living will not allow you to disconnect because you are tying your personal life and work together in an unhealthy pattern. Instead, we need to be honest with others and ourselves about how we are doing. When we are honest we can begin to move toward growth, healing, and the ability to disconnect more because we are untying our personal and work lives.

Utilize “no phone” policies.

A great way to disconnect is to quite literally disconnect your phone. Turn on do not disturb, turn off notifications, stay off social media, and don’t check emails. If that doesn’t work, then literally turn off of your phone or put it in a different room.

Look, I get it. We need to be available but at the same time there is such a thing as work-life balance and phones don’t always allow us to maintain the proper balance. So practice healthy phone use to keep yourself from being inundated with work.

Take extra days at the beginning and end of your vacation.

Have you ever felt stressed leading up to a vacation as you are trying to button up everything at work? Have you felt like coming home from vacation feels overwhelming as you need to catch up on laundry and food shopping as well as all the emails? Me too!

That’s why Elise and I started to add additional days off to prep for vacation before we go and we have a day or two at home at the back end to readjust to normalcy. Giving yourself breathing room at the front and backend of a vacation allows you to truly rest and relax while you’re away because everything has been handled and can be handled when you return.

Be clear about your boundaries.

This one is key to being able to disconnect. The more transparent you are about your boundaries and the more willing you are to hold to them the more you’ll be able to disconnect.

This isn’t easy in the beginning but I can promise you that it is worth it. Talk about how your days off are actually days off. Be willing to tell people you aren’t checking emails or handling work-related tasks when you aren’t working. The more you talk about and model clear boundaries the more people will begin to respect them and you will be able to disconnect in healthier ways.

I’m not going to say I have mastered this. In fact there are still days and weeks that I feel the weight of ministry. But I can promise you that by putting these habits and rhythms into place you will find yourself in a much better place. Simply taking the initiative and beginning to build these into your life will help you relax and breathe better.