The Passage Ceremony: Celebrating Students’ Milestones

Students have a lot of big milestones in their lives. There’s graduation from pre-k, kindergarten, and junior high. There’s turning 16. Becoming an Eagle Scout. Getting their license. Going to prom. Turning 18. Graduation from high school. And many more celebratory moments.

The sad truth is many of these milestones aren’t celebrated or honored for a variety of reasons. People are busy, so family and friends can’t always make it. There are conflicting schedules and events; people don’t always want to go to ceremonies because of the time commitment. And because there are so many moments in students’ lives, it is easy to assume you can skip one and simply show up at another.

The truth is these moments in students’ lives are pivotal and quite important in how they mentally develop and grow, the shaping of their identity, and their understanding of the Gospel. If these milestones are so important, let me pose a question: when was the last time your church celebrated these moments in the lives of your students? I don’t ask this question to shame or make us feel bad, but instead to push us to do some self-reflection. If I’m being honest, until moving to our current church, I never really considered these moments and didn’t do anything to celebrate them other than going to graduation parties.

But is that the best and only option? Or is there something more that we can be doing? The more I’ve thought about the ways we honor, celebrate, commission, and challenge our students, the more I want to share with you something that we have refined and honed over the past six years in order to do just that: The Passage Ceremony. I know, the name needs work, but let me highlight what this is and how we utilize this ceremony to honor and challenge our students. This isn’t a one size fits all approach, but instead is a resource you can adapt and leverage in your ministry setting and refine to make it beneficial for your context.

The Passage Ceremony.

In the course of middle school and high school ministry there are many key milestones that can and should be celebrated. We have chosen three aspects to focus on: transitioning into 6th grade (or middle school), transitioning into 9th grade, and high school graduation. The reason we chose to focus on these moments is because they are shared among students holistically. Not all students go to prom, not all students do extracurricular activities, not all students get their license at the same time. These three moments typically hit the majority of students and allow for the greatest impact. Therefore, the Passage Ceremony centers around these three “rites of passage.”

Our Passage Ceremony has a few key aspects to it. Here is what they include:

1. Food and community. We make sure to provide a lunch for the families who are coming to the ceremony and we utilize round tables to facilitate conversation and community. We also bring in our volunteer leaders to connect them with our students and families.

2. Explanation of the ceremony. We have someone stand up during the meal time to talk to families about why we are hosting the ceremony, what it is for, and to share our commitment to students and families.

3. Intentional time for parents to speak into the lives of students. We know families are busy and life gets crazy, so we carve out 30 minutes for parents and guardians to speak into the lives of their students. We provide some guidance for what this looks like but have found that parents typically come prepared and actually would desire more time because of how impactful it is.

4. Honoring of students. When families come back from their time of encouragement, we host the formal part of the ceremony. We call up students individually according to their grades and give them a gift. Before we call them up, we explain why we are doing this and the symbolism to our ceremony. It is a time of encouragement, celebration, and intentional discipleship.

We take time in the months leading up to The Passage Ceremony to communicate with families what we are doing and what we are asking of them. At the end of this post, I’ve included that letter for you to utilize if you would like.

How to utilize celebratory moments.

In the letter below, you will see some of the order and flow for this ceremony. Additional things we provide include a light luncheon, facilitating the ceremony, and having a time of celebration and recognition at the end. Here are some key things to highlight in celebratory moments:

1. Make sure to recognize key people. This could include parents, students, volunteer leaders, ministry leaders, and others. Recognizing and pointing to them helps to highlight the focus and who the event is for.

2. Have a good facilitator and communicator. When you are honoring students it is important to have someone who can speak truth and encouragement into their lives with intentionality. You don’t want someone who doesn’t know them or stumbles over what to say because that doesn’t communicate value and worth. But having someone who does communicate well helps your students know they are loved and have a place to call home.

3. Make the environment celebratory. This could be as simple as having food and music, or you could decorate your space with balloons and centerpieces, or you could provide gifts. Whatever you choose make sure to be intentional and seek to create an atmosphere that celebrates your students.

4. Connect them with their leaders. Bringing your leaders into these moments is key because it values them, connects them to their students, and introduces them to parents.

5. Pray over your students. Let them know that they are loved and seen, and that they matter to you and to God. So pray for them and be in their corner.

Letter to Families:

As I have served in student ministries, I have seen a strong desire in parents to lead and guide their children as disciples, but the big question has always been “how?” The Passage Ceremony is one way for us to offer guidance to you and your students by giving you time and space to have needed conversations and by allowing us to support one another in this ongoing discipleship process. Parents, church leadership, and volunteer leaders will be part of this ceremony to signify the student’s desire to live as a disciple of Jesus.

Ceremonies are not a regular part of our culture, but with purpose and direction they can have a powerful impact on the discipleship journey of students. The Passage Ceremony is designed for you, as parents or a significant person in a student’s life, to have the opportunity to personally and privately give spiritual guidance and discipleship to them. The spiritual guidance should focus on:

  1. Affirming your commitment to being faithful parents and supporters of your student(s);
  2. Presenting or reviewing clear and specific guidance and evaluation of your student(s) as they continue to live as disciples of Jesus who are sent to build the kingdom of God.

Our vision for this ceremony is threefold:

  1. To affirm God’s design for parents and supporters as the main disciple-maker of their children;
  2. To affirm our commitment to you as a church and specifically as a student ministry to walk and partner with you in this discipleship process;
  3. To provide a meaningful opportunity for you to partner with the church to mark this significant milestone in their life together and commission them to continue to live as a disciple of Jesus.

Ceremonies typically have a symbol attached to them. We request that you supply a special Bible to use as the symbol of this ceremony. In the past families have purchased a new study Bible or use a special Bible they already have. The NIV Bible is highly suggested since it is the translation we most often use at church. Feel free to supply whatever size or color you would like.

We highly recommend that you use the inside cover to write a special note of vision and blessing to your student. Please drop off your signed Bible to the Receptionist’s Office to allow time for our staff to write in it as well. This Bible will be presented to your student(s) at the ceremony. Should you need any assistance in finding or purchasing a Bible, please contact our team and we will do all we can to assist you.

We will also provide time and space for you as parents to speak encouragement, affirmation, and Biblical truth into the life of your student. I would encourage you to think through this ahead of time so you can share this with them on Sunday. You could share why you are proud of them, what you are looking forward to experiencing with them, your desire to walk with them through this next phase of life, the truth of what you have seen God do in their lives, a life verse that you chose for them and why you chose it, and your prayer for them going forward.

What to do When Ministry Hurts

This weekend is Mother’s Day, and can I be honest? I really don’t like this weekend or Father’s Day either. Not because I don’t like my parents, I love them to death. But because this is a hard time for Elise and I as we walk through the infertility journey.

Celebrating with others is hard. Watching all the moms get flowers, cards, and brunch dates is difficult as we sit in our pew waiting and hoping. It’s hard when people ask me questions like, “Don’t you want kids?” Or, “How are you able to lead our kids when you don’t have your own?” In so many ways we can feel unseen and alone.

These questions aren’t unique to Elise and I. Many of us who serve in ministry have been hurt by insensitive or calloused remarks. Things like, “When will you grow up and be a real pastor?” “Youth ministry is just childcare for teenagers.” “Oh you went on a retreat…guess you used up your vacation time.” “Do you really think you’re called to be in ministry?” Or, “You’re a woman, you can’t be a pastor.”

Words matter, and the words we share have great power and impact. I’m not saying anything that those of us in ministry don’t already know. We know the power of words, how they can build up and make you feel on top of the world, and how they can rip your heart out and make you feel like nothing. Ministry hurts sometimes. I don’t think it’s always intentional, but it can often feel like it is crushing your soul. But should we just give up? Should we just roll over? Do we just take it on the chin? What do we do when ministry is hard?

Lean into your networks.

One of the best things I’ve done in ministry is get connected with people who are in similar life circumstances and ministry careers. Being able to talk to people who understand the complexities of ministry and working within a church is huge, especially when they are third parties. They are there to walk with you, love you, and challenge you. These are the people who are in your corner and will have your back.

Find solace in the communities you trust.

In the networks and communities you have, you will most likely find people who you can relate to and connect with in deeper ways. When I joined my cohort in 2021, I never considered how deep and meaningful those relationships would become. But even within that cohort, I connected at a deeper level with two others and as we grew in our friendships we were shocked at how similar our stories were. Because of that unique bond we were able to love, support, and challenge one another on a deeper level. Within your communities you will find people with whom you connect on a deeper level and those who can be an even stronger, supportive community.

Model a caring community to others.

Sometimes dealing with hurt, especially when it’s coming from within a church or ministry, means you need to be able to explain and model what a caring community looks like. Here is what I mean by saying this: sometimes people, and even church communities, don’t know or understand that what they are saying, doing, or implying is actually causing hurt. Whether it’s out of ignorance or lack of understanding, people can do and say things that hurt. Because of this, we may need to model and educate what a truly caring community looks like. In doing this, it isn’t about trying to be smarter or better but instead about helping your communities grow and become more like Jesus in how they love and care for one another. This isn’t easy, but it is something that could truly help generate change and growth.

Be honest with yourself.

There are times I just want to dismiss hurtful things that are said or done. I just want to push it down and pretend like it doesn’t hurt. But the more we dismiss our emotions or push them down to a place we think they won’t return from, the more we are hurting ourselves. It is okay to be honest, to say how you feel or how things have effected you. It’s not wrong to emote and display what you’re feeling. It’s not okay to bury those feelings or to lash out which will happen when you keep trying to push those emotions down.

So be honest with yourself and those closest to you. Let your feelings, emotions, and thoughts be known. If you’re hurting it’s okay to let that hurt be known to yourself and those closest to you. I will say this: it is okay to be honest with those who have said or done things to you (whether unintentionally or intentionally), but be mindful of how you do it and what you say. Words and approach matter deeply, especially when you’re in a leadership position. It doesn’t mean not sharing how you’re feeling, it means doing it in a way that helps them to understand and prayerfully evoke change.

Talk to a counselor.

One of the best things I have done since moving to Pennsylvania is start to see a counselor. It’s honestly helped me in so many ways. It allowed me to address past trauma, to understand the hurt I’ve experienced from churches, how to share my emotions and feelings with Elise, and how to handle different moments that arise each day that often seem out of my control (because they are). I know that in some ways there is still a stigma attached to seeing a counselor, but this will be something that truly will help you process and work through the hurt in your life. It isn’t a one-and-done type scenario. It may take months or years, but ultimately it will help you understand and heal from the hurt that you’ve experienced.

Be honest with your spouse and protect your family.

Sometimes we try to mask our pain from our spouse and family because we think are protecting them. Other times we mask the hurt to keep them from experiencing that same hurt and becoming embittered toward the church. However, that response is not only unhealthy and self-destructive, it will also harm the relationships you have with your family. They aren’t immune to the hurt you’re experiencing, and even when we think we hide it well, we really don’t. Being able to share where you’re at with your spouse and in appropriate measures with the rest of your family allows you to have a safe place, a place of respite.

Listen to honest critique and trusted people.

I’m not always the best at receiving critiques and criticism. It usually sits with me for a long time and I tend to over process what was shared and allow it to affect me in ways it shouldn’t. But I’ve learned that when I have trusted people in my life who I know are for me, I can hear their insight and critique better. When it comes to working in ministry we will often hear criticism, both helpful and not. But when we hear it, we should measure it and see if it is helpful and true. And sometimes figuring this out means going to those you trust and asking for insight even if it isn’t the insight you want. When you have trusted people you can go to, it helps you to self-reflect and self-assess to find ways that you may need to grow and mature. Bringing in trusted people gives you a safe place to process and grow.

How to Help Your Students Want to Read the Bible

Throughout my time serving in churches I have seen biblical literacy continue to decrease in student ministry and I have been astounded by how little students actually know about the Bible. Whether it’s attributing sayings and musing to God’s Word that aren’t there, not knowing where books of the Bible fall, or not even knowing Bible speaks into various topics, the state of biblical literacy is not looking good. Maybe this is just my experience, but I think this is indicative of a trend in younger people and is why we are seeing more and more companies focusing on students to help them grow in biblical literacy.

Now it would be easy for me to sit here and bemoan the circumstances and to be dismayed by the lack of comprehension and willingness to engage with the Bible. But that would be neither helpful nor beneficial. Instead, I want to be a part of the solution. In my role that means working with our upcoming generations and helping to train and equip them in how to use and interpret their Bibles in a way that helps them make real world applications.

Today, I want to look at how we can help our students not only read their Bibles but also seek to engage with and apply them. Students need to see that God’s Word is real and necessary, but they also need to understand why it is important and know what it means to them. This will allow them to be thoughtful and proactive in how they apply the Bible in their lives and in how it shapes them as Christ-followers.

Teach students how.

We have written on Bible study methods before but it is easy to assume our students know how to read the Bible when in actuality they have never been taught. So take time to show them how to read the Bible. Point out the different literary styles and help them learn basic hermeneutics so they can read it appropriately and apply it to their lives. Help them understand it is okay to have and ask questions. Teach them to be analytical and critical readers in order to think about the Bible in broader and deeper contexts. Doing this will help them grow not only in their knowledge of God’s Word but it will also affirm them and help them see that they can discern and interpret the Bible on their own.

Make sure they have a Bible they will use.

Maybe I’m just odd but I have a ton of Bibles and they all serve a different purpose. Some are for studies, others for personal devotions, and I have others because they offer unique and significant insights. But most students aren’t like me. In fact, I have found many students don’t actually have a Bible they want to use or enjoy using. So take time to help students find a Bible that they can read and will want to read. This may mean having more Bibles on hand and having a broader knowledge of different types of Bibles, but it will allow you to help your students grow and engage with God’s Word on their own in a way they can understand.

Point them to helpful Bible study resources.

There are lots of great Bible Study tools out there and there are a lot of not so great ones. In fact, you have probably seen a lot of “teen Bible studies” that feel dated, or they talk down to students, or perhaps feel childish in their designs and studies. Finding helpful resources or Bible studies may feel difficult, but when you find ones that work for your students you will see them grow and gravitate toward reading God’s Word even more. We have written on some resources and you can find that information here.

Model it for them.

I think this is something the church needs to be better about as a whole. We should model what we preach and teach to our people, and not always in a way that shows us succeeding or doing the right thing. I think we need to model the very real aspects of what studying Scripture looks like, both the successes and difficulties. When our students see the impact that the Bible has on our lives it motivates them to want that for themselves. But they also need to see the moments this is hard for you. Let them know about times you’ve struggled to be in the Bible. Show them how you overcame that and highlight how you felt and what being out of God’s Word did to your life. When students see the real pieces of what the Bible does for our lives coming from people they trust, they will want to model that as well.

Set up reminders and show them how to do the same.

Reminders may sound trivial at first but they work. I love my Google calendar and my reminders on my phone. In fact, I have reminders set for all sorts of things not because I forget them, but because they are of high value to me and I don’t want to forget they are there if I’m scheduling other things. Students are incredibly busy and they have all sorts of things competing for their time and attention. If you can help them in prioritizing what is important and show them the benefit of reminders and scheduling, it will help them to see the necessity of staying in God’s Word.

Help students to set reminders, show them how to put things in a schedule, and help them carve out time to read God’s Word. But remember that this may look different than your schedule. Students may have to carve out ten minutes on a crowded bus to read the Bible or listen to a devotion. They may have to do it at night before or after homework. It may not be every day but it may be a few times a week. That’s okay because it is all about growth and consistency. And remember that reminders aren’t a fix-all, they are just a tool to help us. This isn’t a “you do this and you’re good” approach, but instead is a resource to help us grow as biblically literate Christ followers.

Show them why this is important and applicable to their lives.

I believe it is easy to take the Bible and its impact in our lives for granted sometimes. As western Christians, we live the good life where we don’t see the hardships and persecution that Christians around the world face. And I believe this is part of the reason we may not see the Bible as being helpful and applicable all the time: we live an easy life and we don’t see hardship that the Bible helps us through. However, for many of us in ministry we can point to moments when the Bible and our faith in God carried us through dark moments and how that was a turning point in our lives. Students need to hear that! They need to understand that the Bible has a place in our mundane lives and in the moments when life is at its lowest point. Our students don’t see the impact the Bible always has because we don’t show them how it impacts their lives at each moment.

We need to teach them how the knowledge of God’s Word helps to form and prepare us for those rocky moments. We need to show them how the truths of the Bible have a life-changing impact on our lives, our culture, and our world. We need to help model how we can be agents of good change in our world through being who God has called us to be. When we model this reality to them, it builds a spiritual framework for their lives from which they can live out their calling of being disciples of Jesus.

What Are You Teaching: All Church Series

Every now and then, our church does an all-church series. More recently, we have been using the spring semester to collectively work through a study built by multiple staff members to help our church journey in the Bible together. It involves all ages and happens in our services and in all the classes and groups that meet. But there are some unique challenges and circumstances to consider when doing these studies to help them succeed and truly be engaging for students and families.

Make sure your message relates to students. Sometimes when moving through a set curriculum for the church, there are applications and insights that are really beneficial but not always relevant and helpful to students. So look to make sure what you are teaching and encouraging students to apply is relatable to their lives and circumstances. Providing them with real and tangible applications will help them see how the Bible is practical and relevant to their lives.

Don’t teach the same thing that is taught in the services. This is a big deal because part of our vision for students should be to help them engage the church holistically and not just student programming. If we are teaching the exact same message with the same points in student programming that is taught in the sermon, students will tend to default to only the student gathering and forgo the Sunday service. This isn’t beneficial and further drives a wedge that doesn’t need to be there to begin with. Instead, even if you are teaching on the same passage from the sermon, look to find different insights and understandings. Highlight how passages can provide various applications and interpretations. Bring in new illustrations and ways to immerse students in Scripture, and help them discuss what they’re learning in both contexts.

Collaborate with others. One of the best things you can do in these types of series is talk to other staff members and leaders to see what they are teaching. This will not only provide you with insight and creativity, but will hopefully afford you new and intentional opportunities to partner with other ministries. If the adult groups are looking at a particular aspect, it may be helpful to both adults and students to know what each group is doing as there is a high potential students’ parents will be in the adult group. This provides overlap and a platform on which to engage ongoing conversations within families.

Remember everyone may not be on the same page. It is important to remember when going through all-church series that some students may not have a full grasp, if any, of the material you are walking through. So make sure to do due diligence and help students fully understand what is being taught. Also, remember that students may not be present at each level of the study due to other commitments and so summarizing what has been taught is important and also helps students continue to remain engaged.

Encourage students to be a part of the broader conversation. Make sure your students know everyone in the church is going through the series, and that they have a voice because they are the church. Encourage them to engage in conversations with family and friends. Challenge them to ask deep and meaningful questions. Provide outlets and opportunities for them to engage with church leadership on these topics and series.

What are You Teaching: Reading & Studying the Bible

“Only eight percent of global teens believe the Bible is the word of God and read the Bible several times a week.”

This is a stat the Barna Group posted on their Instagram account last week which caught my attention. It didn’t really surprise me, but it did cause me to reflect on how we can better equip and encourage students to read and study Scripture on their own.

If your students are anything like me, I wasn’t taught Bible study methods growing up. I was given a series of Bibles over the years, and found myself navigating through them on my own. Teen study Bibles helped to some degree, but I wasn’t taught what to do when I had personal devotional time. So I just read passages and tried to make sense of them, often failing to do so.

I can’t help but wonder if the students in our programs have had similar experiences. If they have, it’s no wonder they don’t want to read the Bible. If you don’t know how to understand it or where to start, it can feel like a daunting, confusing, and sometimes boring task. Students should be equipped to read, study, ask questions, and understand, so that they can uncover the beauty, depth, and purpose of God’s word.

In this third installment of the What are You Teaching series, I’d like to offer some ways we can help encourage, train, and engage students in their personal Bible study.

Translations: A simple place to start is by making sure your students not only have their own Bible, but one in a version or translation that is easy for them to understand. If the language/wording used is difficult to follow, chances are students won’t stick with it for very long. So look for a solid version that is written in a way that is clear and easy-to-read. Check out this past post for some suggestions.

Audio Bibles: Some students hate reading, or struggle with it. Others find themselves so busy with school, activities, and other commitments, that it is genuinely difficult for them to carve out time to read. Whatever the case may be, don’t forget that an audio Bible is an option. It may help your students to read and listen at the same time, or they can listen while driving or riding in the car between activities. For others, it may help them to calm their mind before going to sleep or while getting ready for school in the morning. If they’re interested in listening, they can download the YouVersion Bible app for free and listen to audio recordings of multiple versions.

Bible study methods: So your students have a Bible, now what? Make sure they are equipped to study it on their own. Some basic study methods include O.I.A. (Observation, Interpretation, and Application), Discovery Method, or S.O.A.P. (Study, Observe, Apply, Pray). These will help your students as they encounter Scripture on their own. You may also want to supply them with pre-scripted studies, that either you or a trusted source have created. Check out this post for some suggestions.

Recommended reading: As you get to know your students, you will learn their passions, interests, and struggles. Rather than have them start reading anywhere, guide them to passages that will appeal to and capture their interest, speak to their season of life, or help them get to know Jesus better. Sometimes students struggle to read the Bible because they arbitrarily open it and read wherever the pages fall. Or they may try to read through a book and get bogged down in a confusing story. Help them connect to the Bible by making personalized reading recommendations.

Start a study: Consider helping students grow further by hosting an in-depth Bible study for those who are interested. You can use this time to equip them further, challenge and encourage them, and address topics with which they may be wrestling. This is another opportunity to personalize it to your group, helping them see how the Bible connects to their real life situations.

Questions: For a while it seems in some churches, asking questions about the Bible was almost taboo. Help continue to break that stereotype for your students by encouraging them to ask questions about the Bible. Host a “stump the pastor” night or an “ask me anything” about the Bible. Even if you don’t know all the answers, take time to do the research and come back with information. Students are naturally curious. Encourage them to bring their questions to God, He can handle them all.

Creativity: Tap into creative ways to read, study, and process the Scriptures. Help your students see that it isn’t just about opening the Bible in a quiet room. God is creative, and we can interact creatively with Him and His word. This may look like artistic representation of Scripture through drawing, painting, or Bible journaling. Students may want to write their own music, spoken word, or poetry in response to what they’ve read. They don’t have to share their creative response with anyone but God, but if they want to, consider hosting an event for them to share their creations and the story behind them.

Make it personal: Do you believe the Bible is the Word of God? Has it changed your life? Have you wrestled through difficult passages? Share this with your students and bring them into your story of encountering Scripture. Students need to see adults who believe in God’s word and how it has been a part of their lives. They need to see that it can be a real and important aspect of the Christian life, and not a boring part of their to-do list to check off. Students connect with personal stories and will benefit from hearing yours.

What are You Teaching: Culture and Worldviews

Current events, cultural movements, worldviews, and relevant topics in the lives of students present great opportunities to dig deep and critically think about practical biblical application. But in order to handle these topics well, we need to be mindful of what is happening, how we approach them, and what the Bible says about them. Last week, we kicked off this series by discussing spiritual rhythms and today we want to continue by engaging the topic of culture and worldviews.

Speaking on these topics is paramount to our ministries because it helps our students see how the Gospel is relevant and applicable in our present reality and culture. Students are seeking to understand how they can be Christians in a world that is juxtaposed to Christianity, and at the same time trying to understand how the issues of today are guided by God’s Word. So as we teach on these areas, it is important that we help students see how the Gospel transcends time and space and the real applications it has for us now. This will allow our students to make biblically-informed decisions and help to elicit needed change from a Godly perspective.

Know your topics. If we are teaching about a topic our students are dealing with, we owe it to them to be well-versed and knowledgeable about that topic. For instance, if you are going to teach on sexuality, it would be beneficial for you to know the correct terminology, culture perceptions, and biblical insight. This will allow you to engage your students where they are at and you will be able to help them understand how to apply the Bible to these types of conversations and cultural settings.

Dig deep into current cultural contexts. I think sometimes it is easy for us to simply present what the Bible says and believe that our students see the application within their spheres. But the truth of the matter is it can be hard for students (and really anyone) to apply what the Bible says to modern context. The Bible doesn’t speak to every circumstance in our present culture, but there are principles and truths that do apply. Helping our students understand how to apply these truths means we must first understand their cultural context. We need to know what issues they are dealing with, why certain issues are important to them, and how to help them navigate cultural distortions of biblical truths. By doing this you can help your students prepare to engage this world with biblical truths that are covered in love and grace.

Know the pressures your students are facing. This is more than just knowing the cultural context, it is about knowing your community and students and the pressures that are uniquely surrounding them. No one group of students, communities, or environments will be exactly the same. So it is important to know the tensions your students are encountering. It may be issues with technology, sex and identity, or social justice concerns. Mental health could be a big factor for your students, or it could be socioeconomic status, or questions about faith and God’s goodness. Whatever the pressures are, the only way you will know them is by engaging your students, families, and communities and seeking to understand their key concerns.

Be aware of how your students think and engage. It may surprise you how your students think and what they believe. They may have differing opinions than yours on biblical truths and principles, and that is okay. Students, like everyone else, need to formulate their own views as they make their faith their own. This doesn’t mean we sit by passively and treat them with kid gloves, but instead we take their opinions and views into consideration and don’t just shut them down. Allow them to push back, ask questions, and formulate a biblical worldview as they navigate their faith.

Give practical application. This is a big one for students. So often they want to contribute to change, growth, and progress, and the application we give should help guide them in how to meet those desires. If they care about justice, help them find ways to advocate in your community and nationally. If it’s about providing food and clean water, guide them to local food pantries and national organizations they can support. If it’s about race and equality, help them find ways to engage their communities in dialogue and movement toward practical change. If it involves changing perspectives and views that may be harmful in the church, show them where to serve, how to elicit change, who to talk to, and advocate with them.

Present biblical truths with grace and love. As I shared above, students will often have differing views than what we may present. Whether it’s because of personal preference, experience, or cultural impact, their views may not always align with the truths of God’s Word. Even when what we present counters their views and perspectives, we must always remember to share these truths with love and grace. Students don’t often hold differing views just to disagree and cause tension, but their views are often informed by relationships, sympathy and empathy, and cultural trends and norms. Because of this, we must be willing to engage in dialogue and discussion that both hears and understands our students and their views, but also lovingly presents the truth of the Bible. Remember it isn’t always about being right, but instead helping to shape and guide our students to an understanding of God’s Word and helping them make their faith their own.

What are You Teaching: Spiritual Rhythms

One of the questions I get asked frequently is, “What are you teaching students?” Whether it’s parents, church leaders, other student workers, or even students themselves, it seems at some point everyone is curious about what is being taught. This week I’m starting a new series we are calling “What are You Teaching,” which will focus on different types of teachings we utilize in our student ministry program.

Before I begin to talk about one of the areas we teach on, it is important to note that while we do focus on different teaching styles, themes, and topics, we also have to be aware of to whom we are communicating. Our program has two different days that we operate (Sundays and Wednesdays) and both draw very different groups of students.

Our Wednesday night program is more invitational in structure and is focused on discipleship and evangelism. This means when we teach on topics in this environment, we stay at an entry- to intermediate-level of understanding to make sure our teaching reaches the majority of those in attendance. In contrast, our Sunday morning programming is geared toward equipping and training our students to be disciple-makers. This means we often go deeper into topics and look at application that leads not only to heart transformation but outward replication.

While both programs are focused on discipleship, how we meet that goal looks different based upon who is in attendance. I would encourage you to think through those aspects of your programing in order to help you pick the right teaching for the group that is relatable, applicable, and transformational.

This week I want to talk about spiritual rhythms and why teaching on them is important. I believe it is easy to assume these rhythms are taught at home and/or in “big church.” But assuming this puts both our students and families at a disadvantage. It is also unhelpful to assume that your students are not being taught or equipped at home in these rhythms. All that to say, don’t assume either direction. Instead view this as an opportunity to explain spiritual rhythms, allow those who haven’t engaged with them to do so, and help those who already engage with them to broaden and strengthen how they do.

Teaching on spiritual rhythms is something that can be taught to students who fall across all parts of the spiritual spectrum. But we must be aware of which rhythms we are teaching to each group to make sure they are translatable and applicable. For instance, I wouldn’t necessarily teach on fasting and meditation on a Wednesday evening. Instead, I would begin by talking about prayer and spending time in God’s Word.

But the real question is what type of spiritual rhythms should we actually teach our students? I have found in my experience most students are not aware of rhythms outside of prayer and devotions of some sort. This may be a broader narrative about what is actually being taught within our churches and how that is reflected in families, but that is another conversation for another day. I think for many youth programs it would be helpful to start with more entry-level spiritual rhythms and then scale upward as you see your students growing and maturing in their walks with Jesus. With that said, here are some spiritual rhythms I believe we should be teaching our students.

Prayer: I believe it is important to teach our students about both personal and corporate prayer. You can show them different postures of prayer, different prayers styles (like thanksgiving, confession, supplication, lamenting, etc.), different communication styles, silence in prayer, journaling, and more.

Scripture reading, meditation, and memorization: Helping your students not just know how to read Scripture but also to meditate on it and memorize it will help them deepen their relationship with Jesus and give them greater opportunities to navigate the difficulties of this world. Take time to teach how to read Scripture and also how to study it. Utilize different strategies and resources to help students learn in different ways. Highlight different tools for memorization and meditation so student don’t just read but also apply the Word of God by allowing it to permeate their lives.

Fasting: This isn’t something that Protestant churches often talk about, but it is something every Christian should engage. Fasting is something that our current culture isn’t acclimated to because we don’t often have to do without for any reason. But training our students about what fasting is, why we do it, and the results of it will help them to not only grow as followers of Jesus but also as young adults.

Communion: There have been many times where I’ve preached and handled officiating communion in our church services. One of the things I love to do is explain what communion is and then encourage parents to walk their children and students through it. It’s a beautiful opportunity for parents to lead their families and also for students to see how and why we share in this moment with each other. This can also be accomplished in student ministry gatherings where you can go deeper into the remembrance, repentance, and restoration (there’s alliteration for ya!) that comes from this sacred moment.

Giving and service: I think talking about finances is often a difficult conversations for churches overall. Asking for money never feels great. But if we frame it from the perspective of giving and service it allows us to focus not just on the monetary piece but the heart motivation. Students may not be able to give monetarily but can give of their gifts, time, and talents. So look to explain why we give and serve, how we can give and serve, and what that accomplishes for the person and the body.

Journaling: I’ll be honest, I am really bad at journaling. I can write messages, blog posts, devotional guides, and emails, but for some reason journaling escapes me. Elise is fantastic at journaling and has a way of truly putting her heart onto paper. When we journal as a spiritual rhythm it helps us share our hearts, put our thoughts about our faith journey to paper, and see how we have progressed in our relationship with Jesus as one of His disciples.

Worship: Worship is one of those things we believe everyone who becomes a Christian knows how to do. For some reason we assume that everyone knows what worship is and we don’t often teach about. But if we don’t teach our students how to worship, they will never understand it nor why it matters. Take time to make sure your students know worship extends beyond just music and singing. Highlight that different worship styles exist. Help students find their way to worship and show them how to make it a part of their everyday lives.

Sabbath: I’ll be perfectly honest and tell you until recently I really struggled in this area. I didn’t know how to intentionally pause and take time to spiritually refresh. I would assert the majority of our culture doesn’t know how to do this well either. We are so busy and so overwhelmed with everything that exists at our fingertips that we don’t usually find space to just refresh and be in the presence of Jesus. So create the opportunity for your students to experience these moments. Train them in what sabbath is and why it is necessary. Show them how it can be a full day, a week, a season, or even just a few hours carved out of a day. Help them to see what it does for their heart and soul, and how it draws them closer to Jesus as they are encouraged and refreshed.

Community and fellowship: I believe community and fellowship are spiritual rhythms that at times can happen naturally. But even as they occur naturally, they can become tribalistic and alienating to outsiders. Part of training our students in this rhythm is helping them see the beauty within the body of Christ that comes from diversity and differing opinions. When we highlight that the kingdom of heaven is made up of believers from different backgrounds, races and ethnicities, theological positions, and political views, it will help students understand the beauty of diversity and how they can have healthy, God-honoring relationships with believers who are different from them. This will also help our students understand how important fellowship and community is for the church as a whole and prayerfully help them stay connected with a local community of believers.

The Value of Home Groups

Back in 2020 when COVID first reared its ugly head, our ministry did what everyone else did: we went virtual. We shared teaching videos for small groups to watch and engage with via Zoom, we supplied online group games, and tried to host large group gatherings digitally. Like many of you, we saw our numbers gradually wane, and as we hit summertime our students were begging us to not meet online as they and our leaders (like all of us) were struggling with Zoom Fatigue.

Summer 2020 was spent searching for meeting alternatives, connecting with other youth workers to pick their brains and find new strategies, and browsing the internet for ideas on how to structure a youth group during a pandemic. Most of these searches yielded very few results. Everyone was struggling with the same questions as we never had to figure this out before, and our ministry education didn’t offer “YouthMin in a Pandemic 101.” Although I wouldn’t be surprised to see that course being offered now.

So I began to think through multiple strategies that would allow our ministry to continue, while still aligning with our vision, and meeting the need our students had for fellowship and community. Enter Home Groups. We came up with an idea that would allow our students to meet together in smaller groups around the community within the comfort of homes while all engaging the same material. We placed individual small groups in homes with leaders and provided them with a pre-recorded video lesson, games and activities, snacks, and discussion questions.

If you had asked me in the fall of 2020 if we would continue to have Home Groups after moving through the pandemic, I’m not sure how I would have responded. It was such a different style of student ministry that I wasn’t used to and it placed a lot of additional weight and responsibility upon my leaders to facilitate and lead their groups.

But enter summer of 2021. We took our students on a mission trip and for the first time we combined our middle school and high school students, and it was a rousing success. I saw my students love and care for one another in new ways. I watched my students step up and lead in a manner I hadn’t previously seen. I saw spiritual maturity in my students that was at least two years beyond where they should have been. What I was able to witness in my students was a depth, vibrancy, and spiritual maturity that had come out of taking a large group and going small.

Our students had actually grown and flourished spiritually in our Home Groups to a degree I had not seen previously because we inadvertently modeled what Jesus did with His disciples. Jesus always had large groups following after Him, but He often went deeper with smaller numbers, and from those smaller groups great fruit would be produced. What Jesus did intentionally, we had to wait for a pandemic to move us in that direction. And I am so thankful it did!

Today, now over two years since COVID entered our vocabulary, we have kept Home Groups as a part of our DNA. We have incorporated Home Groups into our programming once a month. We have also lengthened our small group time during large gatherings because we are seeing that’s where students grow and engage with the Gospel.

Home Groups take a lot of planning and organization, and at times can be a lot to handle. But the reward far outweighs the struggles. Sure, they look different now–no more video message, it’s all inductive Bible studies–but the growth and maturity still exists. We are seeing more students turn out to Home Groups than our normal midweek programming. Students engage with Scripture at deep and tangible levels. They desire the community and intimacy that homes afford. And honestly, I haven’t looked back and probably will not return to “normal” midweek programming ever again. Home Groups were a step of faith, but the reward has been amazing.

If you are looking to deepen the faith of your students, challenge them to think biblically about their lives, provide them with a place to fellowship and build community, and an opportunity to see discipleship happen in their lives, I would encourage you to consider Home Groups as an option. The reward goes beyond students and also impacts your leaders who are given the permission and opportunity to use their gifts and talents to help your students grow and flourish.

In what ways have the past two years reshaped how you do ministry?

Making Leader Training More than Just Informational [Part 2]

Last week we kicked off this two-part series by thinking through a few ways to make leader training more than just informative. Information is helpful and beneficial but it’s important to do more than simply focus on giving information. If all people do is receive information there can’t really be any transformation because there’s no care, practical application, or really any reason for your people to keep coming.

My hope with these two posts is to encourage you to think about how and why you do leader training. The ideas we are presenting are meant to help you think outside the box. And perhaps incorporate new aspects that will not only generate better leaders, but will help develop leaders who develop leaders, all while valuing and caring for them holistically.

Pray together.

Prayer is something I cannot overemphasize enough. I think every ministry has this intention and every ministry leader, hopefully, prays often for their ministry. But when was the last time you prayed together with your volunteers? Is it consistent? Is it allowing the Spirit to guide and direct you, your team, and ministry?

When you gather for training this presents the perfect opportunity to pray with and for your team. This is an exciting opportunity to engage in prayer in new and different ways. You can pray all together for the ministry, or you can pray in smaller groups for one another. You can go on a prayer walk around the building praying for where your students gather and for the entire church, or you can even spend some time in silence praying. Trust me when I tell you that if you consistently pray with your team, be prepared to see God move in powerful and bold ways.

Practice spiritual rhythms and formation.

This runs hand-in-hand with prayer while moving past just one rhythm, and seeks to engage your team holistically from a spiritual perspective. Often training sessions can focus on how to lead small groups, caring for students, safety requirements, and other areas that are very important. But when was the last time you stopped and intentionally trained on spiritual rhythms?

Training your leaders on prayer, spiritual gifts, fasting, journaling, time with Jesus, and various other aspects is hugely important. I think it is easy to assume our leaders know all of these things and further still we may assume they are practicing them. But if they were never taught them, how can we expect them to teach and lead our students through these rhythms? Let me encourage you to take time to actually walk through spiritual rhythms and help your leaders grow in formational ways so they can lead your students deeper in their walk with Jesus.

Change locations.

This is an easy idea but not often one we think about. It is easy to default to trainings at church or in the youth room. But what if you moved it to someone’s home? Better yet, a home with a pool, or a fire pit, or a backyard where you could play games together. Being able to take training offsite or outside of where you meet normally allows you to be creative in your training, it gives your leaders freedom to think and process in a new environment, and it provides a change of scenery which can often lead to new thought processes and perspectives.

If you can’t meet offsite, consider changing the environment you train in. Move things around, bring in comfortable seating, change the lighting, make it comfortable and inviting with decorations. These little touches help you to show intentionality and change a space that perhaps we have become used to.

Provide resources.

Resourcing our leaders is a great way to both help them grow personally and get something into their hands that will be beneficial going forward. This could be handouts and studies from Barna Group, devotional guides for them to use with their small groups, a podcast, helpful tools and resources from Fuller Youth Institute, various assessments like DISC or spiritual gifts, books to read as a team, or even resources specific to your own ministry. These resources aren’t meant to just be things you get into their hands but resources that will help them grow and continue to excel as the leaders God has designed them to be.

What aspects do you make sure to include in your leader trainings?

Making Leader Training More than Just Informational [Part 1]

We just finished hosting annual fall training for all our student leaders and it made me reflect on how our structure of leader training has changed throughout the years. We have gotten into the rhythm of hosting quarterly trainings and while they all differ in focus, the heart and vision remains the same. Each session will focus on some sort of training or equipping, but will also incorporate other elements to make them more engaging, fun, relational, and formational.

Today I want to share a few easy ways to make your leader training more than just informational. I am not arguing for the elimination of information and equipping, but instead would argue that we need to make our training more holistic in its approach. We should think about the information but also the relationships, the spiritual formation of our leaders, and the element of fun.

Provide food.

One of the best ways to make leader training inviting, relational, and community-focused is to have food. Food is attractive to people and also helps to break down barriers. There is reason that Jesus taught around a meal or used imagery of food to help people understand what he was talking about. Food just makes gatherings warmer and more inviting.

So have snacks, share a meal, provide coffee and donuts. Be intentional with the food, don’t just throw out leftovers from youth group, but show your leaders you care in a very tangible way. You don’t need to blow your entire budget on the food, but be thoughtful with what you get.

Have fun.

I think fun is drastically underrated when training happens. Often when we are training we focus on information, policies, and making sure everyone is on the same page. Perhaps you have noticed like I have, how those types of meetings cause people’s eyes to glaze over or they start nodding off. But what if you threw in some fun activities as well?

Try incorporating some type of group game like charades or Scattegories. Set up a volleyball net or 9 Square and just play together at different points. Or set up a church-wide scavenger hunt for your leaders with prizes. These moments help take a mundane, typical training and make it more inviting and fun, which encourages your leaders to continue to come and participate.

Incorporate team building.

Team building can get a bad rap at times. I know I have definitely been at trainings, conferences, and gatherings where the team building was actually more traumatizing than informative and unifying. If you have ever done team building with mouse traps, you know what I am talking about. But there are so many more options to make team building actually focused on building a healthy team.

There are classics like the human knot. There are some newer options like doing a Shark Tank-themed game. You could present challenges to the team that they need to accomplish with certain limitations placed on them. There is the activity that has a teammate leading another teammate who has a blindfold on. A quick Google search lists many different options including ones that focus more on unity, ones designed to make you think and problem solve, and even ones that require little preparation and are easy to run. These are all great ideas and can lead to healthy interactions, debriefs, and unification of your team.

Bring in someone new.

Sometimes a change of the speaker or leader helps in great ways. We have a cool opportunity to work with a local school that is focused on providing education free of charge to families in financial need. We have many students from that school attend our program, so we brought someone in from the staff to share about how we can best minister to and care for those students. It was awesome and so much fun, and frankly better than anything I would have said about what we could do.

So who could you bring in? Maybe it is a volunteer to talk about how to lead small groups, perhaps it is a parent or another youth pastor, or maybe you could bring in a school employee or a local counselor. These new faces will allow your leaders to see the benefit of hearing from others and hopefully help them grow and become better leaders.

What sets your trainings apart? How can you encourage your leaders to attend them?