Crafting a Ministry Vision and Purpose

No matter the ministry or setting we are in, it is important for us all to implement a vision and purpose. A vision and purpose will provide clarity, direction, and longevity to a ministry, as well as provide those within it something to buy into and hold onto. It helps ministries to have a focus which will drive everything they do, and it also helps people jump on board and become a part of what’s happening. A vision gives ministries an identity and focus as they pursue a common purpose.

The question before us is how do we do this, and how do we do it well? Today, my desire is to give you insight and direction on how to begin building a vision for your ministry, and also to help you think critically about what your ministry is and how to help make that the focus going forward.

Know the vision of your church.

As you begin to think through the vision and purpose for your ministry, know your church’s vision. Knowing this will allow for your focus to be in alignment with the church overall and to bring consistency and clarity rather than adding another layer of complexity that could lead to confusion. This will also help you to work better with the church leadership overall and make sure that there is continuity within the church.

Center your vision on the Gospel.

Whenever you are developing a vision and gauging input from multiple sources, it is easy to simply see a plan and a desire and run after them. But we cannot forget the central piece to our vision: the Gospel. Without it, we are simply formulating a plan for another program or service, not a ministry. So as you begin to think through what your vision will look like for your ministry let me encourage you to do two things:

  1. Be in constant prayer about what you are doing. It is easy to simply allow prayer to take a back seat in many areas of our lives. But as we seek to clarify, discern, and ultimately implement a vision for a ministry, we must make sure we are seeking out God’s will and direction which is what truly guides and directs us.
  2. Make the Gospel the reason for and center of what you are doing. Remember that out of the Gospel comes everything we do, say, and think, and as such it should guide our visions, purposes, and programs.

Identify the priorities of the ministry.

This is one aspect that can present unique challenges, especially depending on how many avenues of input you have. Often you will hear people champion priorities they desire or that they believe will make or break a ministry. One of the churches I worked at had multiple leaders who were adamant about going back to a summer camp they had gone to when they were in the program. But the camp’s programming didn’t fit with the overall goal of seeking a discipleship-oriented approach to help our students grow. This didn’t mean it was a bad idea, but it needed to be measured and discerned as to whether it fit with the vision of our ministry.

So as you listen, as you seek to identify the priorities, make sure to hold them against the ultimate goal. If you are looking to curate a discipleship-focused ministry, will all aspects meet that goal? If you are looking to cultivate an environment of invitation, will hosting sword drills bring people in? As you think through these priorities make sure you discern what is best for the goal you are running after.

But, just as a quick aside, remember that what may not seem like a good idea to you now, was once someone’s great idea. So don’t simply dismiss away an approach, idea, or philosophy. Instead approach it with love and grace and be willing to listen and walk through those conversations with others.

Don’t rush or allow the process to slow.

This point sounds like it is in conflict with itself, but the main idea I want to get across is this: the process of establishing and implementing a vision and purpose can and will take time. So do not try to rush through the process. If you try to rush the process people will not feel heard. If you rush the process you will miss key components. If you rush the process you may not allow for God to wholly speak into it and simply frame it based on humanistic desires.

But the opposite is also true: do not intentionally slow down the process. Don’t delay out of fear. Don’t pause because you don’t feel like moving ahead. Don’t slow down because it is hard. This process can be difficult because it will force you to wrestle with key thoughts or patterns that you held that may not align with the vision. Or it could be difficult trying to hear and work with everyone. But that is evidence of the necessity of a consistent vision. Without a vision to unite a team, there will always be disunity. But with a clear and worked through vision you will see people rally to it, and all of the hard work will be worth it.

Bring others in.

It is important to bring your staff team, key volunteers, and key students and families into this process. This can look different depending on your ministry context, and that’s okay. Perhaps you want students involved throughout, or maybe just at key points. Or you could want your staff team to engage with key volunteers to gain insight into the planning process.

Regardless of how you bring others in, make sure to listen and hear what they say. They will bring perspectives and insight you may not have considered, but these perspectives could help in shaping a vision and purpose that is Christ-focused and understanding of your ministry context.

Ask key questions.

By asking key questions of yourself and your team, you will be able to begin to see patterns, themes, and consistent values emerge. They may not all be phrased the exact same way, but you will hear and see them as you engage in these conversations. Not only will asking these questions help you to frame the insight you will receive, it will also allow for individuals to speak into the process and be heard. These questions are not the only ones you should ask, but they are ones that will help you begin to identify and frame out a vision for your program.

  • Why does our program meet?
  • What are we offering to our students?
  • What is unique about our program and what we offer?
  • What do we desire our program to be?
  • Who are we trying to reach through our program?
  • What are the key values of our program?
  • What is different between the days/evenings that we meet?
  • What is the same between the days/evenings that we meet?
  • If you were to write out a vision statement for our program, what would it be?
  • If you were to craft purpose statements for each of the times we meet, what would they be?

What is the vision statement for your ministry? What are some ways that you worked to craft it and hone your ministry’s purpose?

Caring for Students Who are Exploring Their Identity

“Nick, guess what?! I’m asexual!”
“Alright…when did you realize that?”
“This past week while talking to my friend who is too. I don’t like boys or girls.”
“Thanks for telling me this, have you let your parents know?”
“Yeah! Right before we got to church just now.”

This was a conversation I won’t soon forget, and probably represents the way that many of us hear that our students are questioning or exploring their identity. Often it occurs in quick conversations where a student suddenly drops that their identity or sexuality has switched or changed, and we have to know how to engage in those moments. There will be times when the conversations are more intentional and focused, but those are not as frequent. It is also helpful to remember that when these conversations happen, our responses to them are immensely important because students are testing the waters to see if we are trustworthy people.

I want to make it clear that the purpose of this post is neither to be affirming nor non-affirming. Instead, the intent is to give student workers helpful ways to care for students and insight into how to respond when faced with these conversations.

Listen well.

Listening is huge in these moments. Often when a student shares that they are struggling or questioning or changing their identity they are looking to see how you respond. Will you affirm or disapprove? Will you love them or cast them out? Will you listen or seek to challenge? Your response will dictate where the relationship goes from that moment on, so I would encourage you to simply listen. Let the student share their story. Let them talk through how they got to this decision. Help them see that you are for them by giving them space to be themselves and share. This is one of greatest things you could do in these moments.

Include parents.

Often when students come to us as youth workers it is because we are people they trust and know that we love them. They don’t often feel the same when it comes to their parents for a variety of reasons. These may not all be true and may be assumptions on the part of the student, but regardless the fear and anxiety of including parents can be very real for some students.

In these moments it is highly important for you to challenge the student to bring their parents into the conversation. But don’t let them have that conversation alone. Walk with them. Be present during it. Be the mediator and advocate in those moments. And always encourage your students with the truth that no matter the response, you will always be there for them.

Follow up.

Follow-up is really important in these types of conversations. As I stated earlier, students are often searching to see how you will respond and if you will be someone that they can trust. Part of the trust factor is our willingness and ability to follow up with them. Check in and see how they are doing. Thank them for opening up to you. Invite them out for coffee to hear their story. See if they have brought in other believers and the parents. Doing this will not only help your students see that you love them but it will also allow you to have a more holistic understanding as you continue to build and strengthen the relationship.

Seek clarity.

Often when talking with students, I am reminded how confusing these times are for them. They are developing in many ways, they are asking countless questions, and they are being bombarded by different messages from all sides. Because of this they may not even fully understand what they are saying, experiencing, or feeling. I am not trying to discount or discredit any one student, but there have been students who truly don’t know what to say or how to express it, and because of that they may say something they didn’t intend to.

At the same time, seeking clarity on what has been going on, how their home life is, how people have received them, and what the student has perceived is paramount in making sure you love and care for them well. A student may not have had a well received conversation with their parents and you may not know this unless you ask. Or a student may be scared about opening up and as you seek to understand you will gain valuable insight into why. This will in turn help you to better care for your student and guide subsequent interactions and conversations.

Know your stuff.

So often students and parents will come to us seeking understanding and clarity in these moments. Because of that, it is so important to have a working knowledge surrounding these conversations. Dig into resources, understand what people mean when they define themselves, seek to have an understanding of definitions and terms, and know what the Bible says. I know that there will be many perspectives to consider and that you may not be as well versed as people who study this for their career. But we are shepherds to our people and should know how to care for them well and this is an important way to do just that. So seek out information and understanding so you can better relate to, care for, and disciple your students.

Love well and don’t break fellowship.

This is one of the biggest aspects we must follow through on in order to care well for our students. Regardless of whether you agree or disagree with the decisions being made, the lifestyle choices, or the implications of decisions, you have an obligation to still love students and care for them. Too many individuals and churches alike are willing to break fellowship with someone who is walking through these moments, and that has hurt far too many people. We are simply called to love people and show them Jesus because He loves them and desires a full and whole relationship with them. It doesn’t mean you need to agree or condone, but it does mean you walk with them and love them as you show them Jesus. Your job isn’t to condemn, judge, cut off, or cast out, but instead is to show them Jesus and how the Holy Spirit can work in their lives.

So let your students know you are for them. Show them that they are loved and have a place. Help them experience the love of Jesus. In fact, I would argue that these students need more of our love and focus because they won’t be experiencing it from other places as much as their peers may be. These are students who already feel isolated, anxious, and vulnerable and we have an amazing opportunity to love and care for them. That is a high calling and doing so will allow us to truly invest in their lives, speak truth, and walk with them well as we point them to Jesus.

8 Tips for Engaging Difficult Conversations

Tension exists throughout our lives and there will always be moments when we have to navigate difficult conversations. But for some reason it seems that it is easier to avoid or dismiss these conversations when it comes to having them with people in our ministries and churches. It seems that avoidance, passivity, or passive-aggressiveness have become the tools that are more often leveraged rather than actually engaging the tension and being willing to walk with people through difficult moments.

Just because a conversation will be difficult does not mean we shouldn’t have it, nor does it mean that it ultimately won’t be beneficial or helpful. Difficult conversations need to be had from time to time, but we must consider how we prepare for them and how we have them. As we live and worship together there will be difficult moments and times that we need to have conversations that are uncomfortable, but that is a staple of engaging in life and there are healthy ways to do this. Today, I want to share some practical tips with you to help you do this well.

1. Pray about it.

Of course we all know that prayer is important, but how often do you pray about conflict or the people you are in conflict with? Also, how do you pray about those moments and those people? Prayer isn’t meant to be a weapon we leverage only when we need it but instead it is a way to communicate and process with God, and a way to care for others. If you know you are about to enter a difficult conversation, you need to be on your knees in prayer. Pray for clarity. Pray for humility and a listening spirit on your part. Pray for the other person and that you can hear and understand them. Pray for a willingness to understand, process, and ultimately glorify Christ. If you’re aware of a difficult conversation or moment, you need pray about and for it.

2. Don’t assume.

This is a big one. I don’t know about you but when I hear that there is someone with whom I need to have a challenging conversation, it is difficult to not allow my mind to wander, to assume things about the person or conversation, or to think about the worst-case scenario. But in doing all of those things we have immediately discounted and discredited that person. We have made them the issue and we have now started to question and doubt them and their character. Instead, I would challenge you to pause, pray, and seek guidance rather than assuming. Realize that the conversation may actually be a good one and not as problematic as we assume, and see the person instead of the conflict or difficulty.

3. Be honest, direct, and clear.

When you engage in a difficult conversation it is easy to allow for emotions and emotionally-fueled responses to rule the day. Instead I would challenge you to look to be honest, direct, and clear. Don’t allow for emotions or feelings to dictate how you engage but instead come with clarity and facts as you seek to find a favorable outcome. Come to talk about what occurred and present facts with clarity. But it isn’t just about presenting facts and being clear, you also need to listen and respond well to what is said. Being clear, honest, and direct allows for you to respond well because you are not focusing on an emotionally-fueled response but instead on the facts at hand. If you allow for emotional responses to rule in how you engage, you will often misrepresent yourself and potentially hurt the other individuals involved. That isn’t to say you remove all emotion from the conversation but that you present truth in a clear and concise fashion.

4. Have a posture of humility.

This is one of the most important things you can do when engaging these types of conversations. We often approach them from a defensive posture because we feel accused, hurt, put into a corner, or even attacked. And when we are defensive we often can approach these moments aggressively, passive aggressively, or even accusatory. If that is our mindset we will not see the good in the other person nor will we see them as someone created in the image of God. Instead we see them as an antagonist or worse an enemy. Approaching these conversations with humility will not only help us to hear and understand, but it will also allow us to honor the other person and Christ.

5. Acknowledge there may not be full resolution.

This is a hard truth to swallow, but we must acknowledge that this may be the case. There will be moments when a full resolution cannot be achieved for any of a litany of reasons. There may not be agreement, there may hurt feelings, or there may be differences of theology or doctrine. This isn’t a reason for us to not engage with the conversations at hand, but instead to help prepare your heart for this potential reality. It is also important to note that simply because there isn’t a full resolution that doesn’t mean the termination of the relationship. Still seek to love, care, and engage with the other person and honor them.

6. See the situation from the other person’s eyes.

Doing this will allow you to have a better understanding of what the other person is experiencing and to better understand where they are coming from. It is an approach that will allow you to have a softer heart and a fuller understanding of all that is going on, and to be a better listener and leader. It will also allow you to shape your response and better engage with the individual because you are seeing what they see and you are more aware of everything that is happening and being received.

7. Be willing to admit when you’re wrong.

Sometimes we need to admit we were wrong. A difficult conversation may be the result of something that we have done or said, and because of that we have to be willing to be humble and acknowledge when we have messed up. This will not only allow for us to demonstrate a biblical posture of humility, but it will also allow for us to grow as a leader and mature as an individual. When a leader is willing to admit that they are wrong or have messed up, it is an opportunity for growth and for them to model servant leadership to their people.

8. Love the other person well.

It can be easy in these moments to presume or assume the worst about people. To see them in a negative light can become the quick and simple response. But we are not in the business of casting blame or assuming the worst in people. We are in the business of loving and leading others as Jesus does. So in the midst of everything that happens in these difficult moments, I want to challenge you to love the other person well. Follow up with them. Pray for and with them. Don’t pause the relationship. Don’t allow for there to be awkwardness in the relationship from your end. Don’t talk about them or the situation. Honor, love, and respect them and you will see these responses actually helping to diffuse the difficult moments and enhance the relationship.

What is one tip you would give to someone about how they should engage with difficult conversations?