Tag: Volunteers

Embrace Your Facilities Team

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Each of us is acutely aware of what it takes to set up a room, a night of ministry, or a special event. Some ministries have to do their own set up and others have a facilities team that takes care of certain or all aspects of their set up needs.

In my early stages of ministry I was responsible for all types of set up. I was a part-time solo pastor in a tiny church that was comprised of mostly retirees who couldn’t help. That meant I was responsible for all set up on Sundays and any ministry event. Over the years since, that has evolved as we have moved to different churches and each of them have had their own unique experiences with a facilities team.

Often times the individuals responsible for taking care of our facilities and ensuring that events are ready to go can be overlooked. People don’t think about all the work that goes into making Sundays and ministry events happen. We don’t think about bathrooms being stocked, tables and chairs being set up, carpets being vacuumed, doors unlocked, and lights turned on. The reality is that these are just the basic functions that most facility teams handle; many of them handle a litany of other functions.

They are the backbone to our churches and ministries and without them many key aspects of our communities would cease to exist. The sad truth though is that these amazing individuals are often not seen, rarely complimented or thanked, and often spoken about poorly whether directly or indirectly. Typically the only time we think about our facility teams are when we need them.

But what if we actually saw our facility teams and embraced them? What if we helped them to see that they are loved and valued? Imagine if we uplifted and cared for them, highlighting how important they are. That would help our teams, our ministries, and our churches flourish in even greater ways. So what are some ways we can love and care for our facility teams well?

Start by noticing them and saying thank you.

Don’t only say thank you for when they serve you or your ministry. Notice them on busy days, say thank you for how the church works, and stop by their office to share the ways they helped your ministry go well.

Bring them a small thank you gift.

On the cold winter days when they clear the sidewalks and parking lots, bring them some hot cocoa and/or coffee. Stop by with some homemade cookies to thank them for how they set up for your ministry. Bring muffins and coffee in for breakfast for the team; that may mean going to work earlier than normal because most start before anyone else is in the building.

Send them a card or a bunch of cards.

We all know the value of a handwritten card. It makes you feel special, seen, valued, and loved. So why not pen one for your facilities team? Or better yet, why not ask your ministry to write letters? Imagine if all your students and leaders wrote simple thank you notes and you were able to encourage your facilities team that way. What an amazing and encouraging opportunity to help them see that what they are doing matters.

Listen well.

The other day a member of our facilities team needed to talk. I was cleaning up the morning after an event and he came out to help. I’ll be honest: I didn’t want to stay outside to cleanup any longer than I needed to. In central Pennsylvania it’s hot and humid this time of year, and I wanted to get back to my nice, cozy, and cool office.

But I could tell that he had something he needed to share. So I stayed and we talked for over half an hour. It was awesome and super intentional. It was clear he just needed someone to listen and hear him because he felt no one else would. Taking time to stop, engage, and listen to your facilities team will help them know they matter and that you care about them.

Get to know them.

At our church we have handful of facility staff members and a lot of volunteers who serve with them. I’ve intentionally sought to get to know their names and say hello to each of them when I see them. We all know and understand the power and implications of knowing people’s names. When we do that with people who serve our church so well it is an easy way to demonstrate love and care.

Help out.

This is an easy way to embrace the facilities staff in your church. Stepping in and helping to set up or tear down tables and chairs, offering to vacuum or sweep the halls, showing up to help shovel snow, or cleaning the kitchen after an event. These all sound like simple tasks but they quickly pile up and take a lot of hours to accomplish.

By stepping in and helping, you’re giving your facilities team extra margin and showing them that they matter. It does require time and effort on your part, but I can guarantee it will create a deepened relationship and team mentality.

These few ideas are not the only ways that you can love and embrace your facilities team; but they’re an intentional starting point. How do you love and embrace your facilities staff?

Embracing Yourself

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We are all unique. We bring different skills, personalities, giftings, backgrounds, experiences, and perspectives to the table. These aspects are what make each of us uniquely suited to serve in student ministry.

But if you have been around student ministry, or ministry period, you have probably heard or assumed that a youth pastor should look and act a certain way. There’s the image of a young, hip youth pastor who can play guitar and knows everything about pop culture.

There’s the personality that’s charismatic and outgoing. The youth worker who is energized by large gatherings that are filled with excitement and energy. The youth worker who is everyone’s best friend and all the students relate to them.

Or on the flip side, there’s the stereotypical youth pastor who dresses down all the time, is a glorified babysitter, and is called on to preach only when the senior pastor is out of town.

Do any of these sound familiar? Have you heard or experienced any of those presuppositions? I know I have in my career, many times. And if I’m honest, those presuppositions can be pretty defeating and hurtful. I don’t fit those molds at all and if those molds were the picture of the perfect youth pastor, I wouldn’t have a job. But can I let you in on a secret?

There is no “perfect” youth pastor or youth worker. There’s no “right” personality type or style or leadership. You don’t have to fit a certain mold or stereotype. You can and should be uniquely you!

God has created you in a unique and purposeful way. Your personality, your gifting, your strengths, and even your weaknesses have uniquely positioned you for ministering to students. You don’t need to dress a certain way or have all the glitz and glam. Those aren’t bad things but they aren’t ultimate things.

You can be soft spoken and relationally-focused. You could be outgoing and a gifted communicator. You can focus on discipleship or have a desire to be more evangelistic. You may have a passion for large events or smaller gatherings. Structure can be your strength or your ability to work on the fly. Whatever you bring to the table makes you, you.

Now I’m not advocating for passivity or to simply show up and not seek to grow and develop. What I am saying is this: your gifts, personality, and skillset are uniquely given to you by God to equip you for ministering to students.

So lean into those gifts, further your strengths, and seek to shore up your weaknesses. Don’t allow for who you are or presuppositions or the stereotypes to keep you from doing what God has called you to do. Embrace yourself and your gifts and allow for God to work through you in the intentional way He has desired for you.

So what makes you, you? What gifts, strengths, and skills do you bring to the table? How are you highlighting those abilities and helping others to see you and your skills as God does?

Embrace and lean into your skills and abilities! You are exactly who God wants in the space He has placed you in. Never forget that! Embrace yourself and allow God to work in and through you as you shepherd and guide the next generation.

Trip Tricks: Road Trip Hacks

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This summer we had two mission trips we went on: one was a couple hours away from our church and our other one was over nine hours away in Kentucky. Both trips were amazing and we saw our kids flourish and grow in their relationship with Jesus and one another.

I could spend countless posts talking about what happened on these trips and all the ways we saw God work in and through our groups. We all know the value of trips and the importance they hold in the lives of students.

However, have you ever stopped to think about the actual drive and what happens during those moments? For years, I would simply hop behind the wheel of a fifteen passenger van and head to a camp or allow the bus driver to drive us to a retreat without a second thought.

But when it comes to ministry, intentionality is key. Even in the seemingly ordinary or mundane moments, we must be intentional with our students and how we engage with them.

This can look different depending on the setting, the makeup of your students, the context of where you are and what you are doing, and what your group has experienced. Today, I want to share with you just a handful of tips to help you make the most of your next trip.

Create different types of playlists.

You know your group which means you have an idea of what kind of playlist(s) you should have ready to go. Whether it’s your whole group together or smaller groups in individual vehicles, creating various playlists allow you to have an appropriate variety of music to play. A couple quick tips for playlists includes:

  • Make sure your playlists are downloaded because there are still places that do not have cell phone service
  • Turn off explicit content. That setting may be on automatically and it could make for some awkward moments.
  • Lastly, make sure you have a good copilot who will potentially be accessing your device for music changes.

Play road games.

These are always a great idea and come in a variety of styles and gameplay. Elise and I love the “Alphabet Game” when we travel long distances. There are other great games that you can find with a simple Google search like these from AAA. These games were stylized for kids and families, but you can easily adapt them for your setting and group dynamic.

Question-and-answer style games are also huge wins because it allows for conversations and for there to be interaction between your group. These types of games can range from deep and serious conversations to lighthearted and fun.

Utilize “Ask Me Anything.”

If you’ve ever driven a vehicle on a student trip, you know how loud it can get. There are some trips when I get back and everyone has left and everything is unloaded, that I just sit in my car for five minutes in silence. But have you ever paused to consider how you could utilize that noise to your advantage?

I love setting up an “Ask Me Anything” because it quite literally sets up a conversation that can and will go anywhere. I’d encourage you to set parameters if needed (i.e. theological conversations, cultural or current event conversations, or get to know you questions) but also be willing to engage with your group. These moments allow for authentic engagement, provide you an in-depth understanding of your group, and help your group get to know you better.

Ask good questions.

This is really key for the driver and copilot or leaders sitting in different positions within the vehicle. Knowing how to ask good, open-ended questions is key to keeping the conversation going and to helping your students grow and mature.

When you are able to engage conversations well, you’ll not only help the conversation to continue but you’ll also get to know your group better. I have found you can simply listening as the conversation develops and interject with questions as the conversation warrants.

This highlights intentionality and that you care enough to engage and listen to them. The key with these questions isn’t to prove you’re right or smarter than them, but to actively engage and walk with your students in an authentic, discipleship-oriented relationship.

Quick Tip: It Never Hurts to Ask

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“Hey Nick, if you ever need any candy for youth group, all you need to do is ask!” I’ll never forget that conversation with, at that time, a new leader for our middle school ministry. From that point on any candy needs we had, he covered them.

Whether it was providing candy for special events, chocolate bars for s’mores, or just a bag of candy on my desk as a thank you; candy was simply an ask away. But you know what that simple conversation helped me understand? All I needed to do was ask if I had a need.

But here’s the thing: in the past, I have struggled to ask when there’s a need. Whether it’s a pride thing, comfortability, a lack of awareness, or a combination of all the above, I struggled to ask.

Now guess what? When I started to ask, when I shared what our needs were, our church community rallied to our cause. I would never have considered asking about candy being provided, even though we live in an area that has multiple chocolate companies just down the street from our church. But because a volunteer approached me with a way to meet a need, it helped me remember something: the church is in this together and they want our young people to succeed.

So what could you ask for? Of course we all jump to volunteers because that’s what we all need. But what if we saw beyond that? What if we asked for people who would be willing to open their homes or prepare a meal? What if you shared needs for supplies and resources? What if you simply asked?

Over the past couple of years we have begun sharing our needs more openly and it has provided us with so many amazing new relationships, community engagement, and ways to better bless and care for our students and leaders.

Here’s the rub: asking someone for something isn’t bad. It is a huge asset and a way for the church to be the church. But even if the request is denied, remember to say “thank you” and don’t let it defeat you. Keep asking. Keep sharing the need. And watch what God will do through the church body.

Resourcing Leaders

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Elise and I have each been in youth ministry for twenty plus years. That’s crazy when we step back and think about how things have changed during that time. Technology has evolved. How youth groups do things has changed (bye-bye “Fear Factor” challenges). Styles and culture have changed. Students are walking through more difficult things.

Have you seen how things have changed and evolved over the last couple of decades? What about over the past five to ten years? The reality is that our culture and what our students are walking through has changed drastically and will continue to do so. But with that can often comes a feeling of ineptness for ourselves and our volunteers.

If you’re like me you may remember the first time a student came to you about a new issue you hadn’t been taught how to respond to. Maybe it was about eating disorders or disordered eating. Perhaps it was about sex, sexuality, and gender. Maybe it has to do with cutting and self harm. Or was it the time a student talked about the reality of their mental health and how it was affecting them.

Do any of these sound familiar? Have you ever had a student come to you with these issues or any of the litany of others we deal with? Here’s the thing: many of us have had some type of formal training if we are on church staff. Whether it was a single semester class, listening to podcasts, going to conferences, or additional resources at your disposal, you probably have more knowledge than some of your lay people when it comes these issues by nature of your role and responsibilities.

That is not a slight against our volunteers, but instead a challenge for us to be aware of what our people need. Typically, those of us who are leading ministries have more knowledge and awareness of issues or we know what resources to utilize when needed. The majority of our volunteers may not have the same knowledge or background and because of that we bear the responsibility of helping to resource and equip our people.

With that responsibility in mind, we should do all we can to help our people when different issues or circumstances arise. I understand that for many ministry leaders, paying for resources may not be feasible each year or at all. The resources you stock don’t necessarily have to be resources that require you to pay for them.

You could download and print out articles to share. Podcasts are an easy option to resource to your leaders. Websites like The Bible Project have videos, articles, and more for your leaders. Some national ministries may also be willing to send you resources at a discounted rate or for free if you reach out to them about your circumstances.

If you are able to purchase items for your leaders here are some ideas for what you could utilize to resource them.

Study and Journaling Bibles: Having study bibles or journaling bibles for your leaders and students to utilize in small groups, discipleship relationships, or for individual study are great resources.

Bible Study Resources: Equipping your leaders with resources to help students study the Bible is a huge win. This will help your leaders feel prepared and ready to walk with students through God’s Word and help them understand it.

Bible Studies: We love She Reads Truth and He Reads Truth for all of their materials. Their Bible studies are great for students because they don’t speak down to them or try to be hip and cool. Instead they offer topical, whole book, and character Bible studies. While these may seem a little costly you can get digital versions for less and if you subscribe to their emails, you can watch for sales including their clearance sales when books are significantly marked down.

Topical Books: If I have learned anything throughout my years in ministry, it’s never be surprised by the questions you are asked. Whether from students, parents, or leaders, the questions will always be there and they will span a wide swath of issues and circumstances.

With that in mind, we have curated books on a variety of topics to help people think through and navigate different issues. We have books on mental health issues, books on hot button issues in Christendom, books about identity, books on community, small group leading, and more. Basically if we saw a book that would be helpful, we allocated part of our budget to begin building a library of resources.

Scriptural Citations and Resources: One thing we have started to accrue over time is a running list of Scripture references for a variety of issues. So often students are looking for answers and ask “what does God think about this” or “what does the Bible say about that.” Having a running list of references allows us to resource our leaders and to point them toward what the Bible has to say.

What resources do you make sure to give to your leaders?

Quick Tip: Invest in a Label Maker

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I know, I know. You probably read the title of this post and thought, “really, that’s the topic for today?” I get it, it may not seem like a post that should be on a site devoted to helping youth workers succeed in ministry. But trust me, it is a much needed post. Let’s think about this for a moment.

What do label makers do? They make labels. And why do we need labels? To help us and others know what different things are and where they are stored. Within each of our ministries, we probably know where everything is. I bet if I showed up at your ministry and asked for a specific item’s location you could tell me in a heartbeat. You also probably know how much of each item you have.

But do your volunteers know where everything is? Do they know what items you have and how many? What would happen if you got sick on a Sunday morning or youth group night? Would your team know where everything is and how to operate it?

Here is where the unassuming label maker comes into play. Your game supplies are labeled so they know what you have and if the supplies they need are present. The log in for the laptop or computer is labeled on the laptop. Instructions for the sound system are adhered to the sound board. Essentially a label maker removes ambiguity and allows everyone to be able to utilize the necessary aspects of your ministry even if they aren’t the normal lead person.

This is also a great way to care for your team and ministry, as well as setting up the next person in your position for success. You are helping your team and volunteers succeed by making things foolproof and helpful, and you are preparing your ministry for handoff when that time comes.

For those of us who have moved into new ministry positions, we know what it’s like to step into someone else’s world. You don’t know where everything is. Storage and organization isn’t how you would do it. You’re unsure of what items are in closets and what supplies you actually have. But when you label things you are setting up your ministry for a beneficial handoff and whoever comes after you for success. In essence you are being a good steward and caretaker of your ministry and setting it up for the long haul.

Never underestimate the humble label maker, and instead use it to enhance your ministry and to help your team succeed.

Quick Tip: Intentionality at Grad Parties

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If you’re like me, graduation season is in full swing and graduation parties are popping up every weekend. But have you ever asked yourself, “why do I go to these?”

I know I’ve been to ones where I only knew the graduate and their family, and in some cases just the graduate. I’ve been to ones that felt awkward for a variety of reasons. And still others where I stayed for hours on end.

But still, the question of “why do I go” hasn’t been answered. So why do we go? Of course we go for the graduate and to celebrate them, but that cannot be the only reason.

Let’s be honest for a moment: while the graduate may be happy to see us, their focus will be on their friends and family. So if we limit our reason to going to simply to celebrate the graduate (and eat good food), I think we are missing a broader opportunity.

When we practice intentionality at graduation parties, it allows us to have a broader impact as we love and care for our community. If we simply go to just celebrate our graduates, we miss out on intentional moments with parents, families, friends, our leaders, and even complete strangers we may meet in line for the guestbook.

What I would encourage is that we go to celebrate our graduates but also to intentionally engage and invest in the other people who are at the party. If we take the moments we are given and seek to have intentional conversations, love the people present, and celebrate the graduates, we will see the opportunities for engaging with our community flourish and be much more fruitful.

So when you go to grad parties this year, practice intentionality and love your community well. Not only will this make the parties more meaningful but you will also see relationships flourish because of the impact your ministry will have.

5 Ways to Listen Well

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Have you ever been a part of a conversation where it was obvious that the other person wasn’t listening? Perhaps you noticed a glazed look that came over the other person. Or maybe you were able to tell that you weren’t heard by the response the other person gave. Did someone continually try to tell you how to fix the problem but didn’t actually know what the problem was because they never let you fully share what was happening?

I think many—if not all—of us have experienced a time when we weren’t heard. But allow me to pose a different question within the same topic: have you ever been guilty of not listening well? Hits a little different doesn’t it? If we were all to take a deeper look into our own interactions we may notice that we are just as guilty of not always listening well.

So the question before us is simple to state but perhaps more complex in the intentionality we must implement: how do we listen well? I want to share a few simple ways to do this, but also to highlight that these aren’t fix-alls. It starts with our heart and intentionality in building authentic relationships that honor and dignify both individuals as we seek to reflect the love and personhood of Jesus.

1. Listen to understand not problem solve.

If you’re like me, you may be someone who wants to fix whatever problem you are given. However, some people just want you to listen, understand, and empathize with them. When we listen to fix the problem we will miss what the actual problem is, we devalue the other person by not actually listening to them, and we are looking to make ourselves the hero rather than just a friend. Instead we should listen to understand which values the other person and builds trust and rapport between both of you.

2. Ask clarifying questions.

Listening well means you are seeking clarity and understanding. In order to accomplish that well, we need to ask clarifying questions. This highlights that you were listening and that you truly want to understand what is happening as you walk in community with the other person.

3. Allow people to finish their thoughts.

I find myself often wanting to jump into a conversation before I should. I assert my thoughts before the other person has finished talking. I try to finish other people’s sentences, and I try to discern where the conversation is going before it actually arrives at that point.

But there is an inherent problem in all of these above things: it tells the other person their perspectives, thoughts, and insights do not matter because you have it all figured out. It actually devalues them and elevates us. Instead we should seek to truly listen and allow others to fully articulate themselves as we seek to understand.

4. Be fully present and not distracted.

It is so easy to get distracted during conversations. There’s things happening around us, different noises, technology, phones and watches buzzing, and a litany of other things competing for our time and attention. Many of us have experienced people being distracted while we talk to them and we know how that makes us feel. That means we should strive to do the opposite as we care well for our people.

We should be present and do whatever we can to minimize distractions. That can be switching on “do not disturb” on our devices, shutting a door, putting our backs to distractions, or anything else that will help us to focus and be present.

5. Be responsive.

When we are actively engaged in listening well, we should show that in our actions, reactions, facial expressions, and verbal responses. When we respond to what people say, it helps to highlight our engagement and attention to the other person. This comes through our body language, shifting our positions, leaning into the conversation, giving verbal responses, appropriate emotional responses, and making sure we are looking at the other person.

The more we listen well the more we will see our relationships flourish and grow in authenticity as we seek to love and value others.

Quick Tip: Caring for Leaders

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Have you ever had a leader experience loss? How did you respond? Has a leader on your team ever had a surgery or prolonged illness? Was there a celebratory moment like a college or graduate school graduation? Has there been a birth or adoption within your community?

When it comes to caring for our people, we need to practice intentional community and support for them. Often we can default to monetary care, and while that can be a part of caring well, we can and should be thinking about different opportunities to love and support our community. But what are some additional ways to care well during difficult or celebratory moments?

  1. Send a personal handwritten note or card.
  2. Pray with and for the individual.
  3. Visit with them and make sure you have allotted the appropriate amount of time to visit.
  4. Send flowers and/or balloons.
  5. Send a gift card to your local supermarket or DoorDash to help provide meals.
  6. Start a meal train and bring a meal by yourself.
  7. Encourage your youth group to write cards to the individual.
  8. Put together a gift basket with contributions from your leaders and/or youth group.
  9. Help out with any service projects around the home and encourage your students to help with these.
  10. Check in and see if they need help with childcare or pet sitting.
  11. Ask families to contribute to any of the above ideas.

These aren’t meant to be a catch all, but instead to challenge us to think creatively when it comes to caring well for our people. We want them to know they are seen, loved, and missed and these are just some options that help us to think outside of our normal ways of doing things.

Quick Tip: Build Authentic Friendships

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Ministry is lonely. There’s no denying it. Depending on your context and setting, it may be felt in substantially larger ways.

In my context it seems like everyone knows me because of my job. It’s always, “Hi, Nick” in the supermarket or “Hello, pastor” at the gas station. The reality is that it’s often hard to build authentic friendships in my context because I’m always seen as a “pastor” rather than just another person trying to follow Jesus and be authentic with others.

If I’m honest, that reality actually led me to keep authentic friendships at arms length for a very long time, which led to increased loneliness that grew exponentially during the global pandemic. That became the tipping point for me and I realized I truly needed to have authentic friendships in order to continue to not just make it through life but also to thrive.

That meant I needed to take a risk and realize that I would have to open myself up to others and deal with past hurt from other friendships. In doing so, I had to identify that not every friendship will work out, nor will every friend hurt me like some had in the past. If you’ve been hurt or betrayed, you know just how difficult it is to open yourself up again, and the entire premise of this article probably leaves you feeling anxious and unsure.

I get it. Even as I write this, I can’t help but rehash past friendships that left me hurt and broken. But can I offer you some hope? There are authentic and meaningful friendships that exist and can offer the healing, community, and depth that we all need.

Let me also encourage you to look for friendships outside of your normal contexts. Yes, look within your communities and church, but recognize you may need to look elsewhere. Sometimes you need a safe place to process and be honest about work and what is happening within that context.

Consider reaching out to other youth workers in your community. Join a cohort. Find networks in your area. Utilize social media groups to find ways to connect with others. Consider reaching out to friends from college. Connect with coaching organizations and see if they have networks. Talk to former youth pastors and see if they could be mentors and friends. Reach out to your denomination (if you’re a part of one) and ask about connection opportunities. The broader your target, the more potential you have to find something that works.

Yes, there is risk with this but I can promise you the reward is great. I’ve been able to build lasting friendships from cohorts, college, and within our church community. All of which have been of great benefit to me and I am forever grateful.

Let me encourage and challenge you to seek out friendships that allow you and the other person(s) to truly be authentic and be for one another. Take a risk and be willing to trust others. You’ll be the better for it.