Tag: ministry

Tips for Hosting a Leader Christmas Party

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When this post drops, we are only a week and a half away from Thanksgiving, which means Christmas is just a little over a month away. For our ministry, Christmastime involves two big events: a Christmas party for our students and a Christmas party for our leaders.

I love both of these, but our leader party is by far my favorite because we get to do life with our leaders who are our friends and family. We get to celebrate what God has been doing, there’s good food, we give gifts to our leaders, there’s games and friendly competition, and time to celebrate the season together.

There’s a ton of work that we put into this to pull it off, but it is so worth it because it affirms and encourages our people, and it’s a special time to build into our community and show them how much they mean to us. However, that doesn’t mean that it needs to be a lot of work for you. Planning ahead, creating a memorable moment, and caring for your team are things you can do even without a budget or months of work. Today, I want to provide you with some key elements to consider implementing to make your leader Christmas gathering special and in doing so, help you plan ahead for a busy time of year.

Provide refreshments.

This could look a hundred different ways, but I would highly suggest having some type of refreshments at your Christmas party. This could be a full on meal, snacks, appetizers, or even a potluck. We have been asking students’ families to provide baked goods and appetizers for the past few years to resounding success.

We have simply put together a digital signup coupled with an email highlighting this past year and asking for supplies. This works best for us because it saves on finances and allows our leaders to see just how appreciative families are for the work and care they put into their students. You don’t need to incorporate our idea, but instead seek to implement whatever works for your ministry and your budget.

Incorporate what leaders enjoy.

This is a big part of making these moments special. If your leaders love to play games and compete, find ways to incorporate those types of activities. If they strongly dislike games, don’t play games or limit the amount of games to only one or two. I’ll be honest, we have found that our leaders enjoy more community than structured activities at our Christmas party, so we try to make our Christmas party more community-focused with time to fellowship, eat, and enjoy being together.

Share encouragements.

Encouragement is something I have striven to build into the schedule for our Christmas party because it helps leaders recognize their value and worth to our ministry and church. We highlight what we have seen God do in and through them. We look to highlight big God stories from throughout the year like baptisms, students following Jesus, students who have grown spiritually, and trips we have taken.

The reality is there can be hard moments in student ministry and it can be discouraging. Taking time to reflect and share encouraging stories and moments is so important to building up and showing your leaders the impact they are having.

Play together.

Earlier, I highlighted incorporating aspects that leaders enjoy and I mentioned that if they dislike games then don’t incorporate them. And you may read this point of “playing together” and question whether those two points are compatible together. And the answer is “yes.” Just because some leaders may not like games, that doesn’t mean you can’t play together; the two are not mutually exclusive.

You can incorporate activities that aren’t competitive or are more laid back like cookie decorating or gingerbread house building. You can play one game versus five. You can have fun by encouraging leaders to share stories from the past year that just made them laugh. Moments like these will help build the atmosphere and environment of celebration and fun into your Christmas party.

Build relationships.

This may sound like a no-brainer, but sometimes we need to be intentional in crafting opportunities to foster relationships among our people. This can be done in a variety of ways including how you set up seating, encouraging conversational moments, shaping the schedule to allow for intentional moments, and even stating that to your people. These times can be built in through a variety of means, but the key is making sure to do so. When you have these moments with your people it not only builds relationships at that specific time, but it also helps your team to draw together in ongoing ways and creates a stronger bond among your team.

Make the gathering special.

When it comes to moments like these where we are trying to bless and encourage our people, we need to make sure we are doing our best to make the gathering special. This can include how we decorate, bringing in environmental elements like cozy seating and decorations, having music playing, intentionally crafting a schedule that reflects the occasion, and giving gifts. These don’t need to be things that break the bank, but instead can be creative elements that bless your leaders and help them to know they are seen, loved, and valued.

Comforting Those Who Grieve

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History was made this last Tuesday with the presidential election. No matter which side you fall on, or if you’re one of the millions who didn’t fit neatly in any bracket, we have to admit there were countless firsts throughout the entirety of the election. At the end of the day, someone and multiple other people lost. That’s the reality of an election.

But this one, well, this one just felt different. For the winners they feel vindicated and as if the skewed power dynamic has been righted. For those who lost, they feel scared, betrayed, and worried for the future. It’s often in moments like these that the winners take a victory lap (typically on social media) and the losers share their fears and apprehensions (also on social media).

In years past, these moments of sharing have lead to horrific conversations, falling out among friends and families, people leaving the church, and much more pain and heartache. As I sat thinking through the events of this past week I must be honest and say my first thoughts were frustration and questions. But then my heart began to break because I feared what may cause my friends who are hurting to walk away from the church and Jesus. In an election cycle that wasn’t simply political and partisan, and instead leaned heavily into the church world we call home, it is hard to not see the pain and hurt that happens here in those spaces.

As Christians we have a biblical mandate to walk with those who are grieving and to not take a victory lap (pride goes before the fall). I’m not saying don’t celebrate, but instead think of others first. Be willing to see them as Jesus does and to stand in the gap with and for them. This isn’t something we should do only after the election–though I must admit that the results have been the catalyst for this post–but something we as the church should be known for in all moments! We have a calling, an obligation, and a command to walk with, care for, and love our hurting brothers and sisters. The question is how do we do that well? Today I hope to share just a few ways we can offer comfort to those who are grieving in any circumstance.

Listen first.

This is key to caring for others and often something that people struggle with doing. We are quick to offer suggestions, to look toward fixing things, or to try to solve the problem. But when we do that we don’t listen well, and if we don’t listen well, we don’t know how to care because we won’t truly understand. So make sure to simply listen and by listening look to care well.

Seek to understand.

This goes hand-in-hand with listening first. When you listen well you can understand what is happening. It’s often in moments of grief, pain, and loss that people will articulate how they are feeling and perhaps their view of God. They may not be theologically correct, but in moments of pain they are simply grappling with their emotional hurt and thoughts. So instead of looking to correct or offer the proper perspective, look to understand and see what they are feeling. When you listen and understand then you obtain the permission relationally to offer insight and perspective.

Engage in empathy and sympathy.

Our ability to show that we are with and for someone who is grieving is paramount to helping them process and heal. That means we need to show empathy and sympathy in those moments. Hurting with them. Understanding their pain. Relating with their feelings. For some this is easy but for others it’s difficult or uncomfortable, and much of this rests on our personalities. But regardless of where we fall individually, we must be willing to engage with these feelings.

When you can sympathize and show empathy, you’re helping to validate the hurting individual, showing you care and understand, and highlighting that you are a safe person. Think through what you say and don’t say, consider your body language, and understand how facial expressions play a role in these moments. When you consider those aspects you will find yourself engaging in more proactive and beneficial ways.

A word of caution though: don’t fake it and don’t pretend to understand when you don’t. Be honest in what you say and thoughtful in how you say it (i.e. you may not understand how they feel but you can say, “This grieves my heart and I am hurting for and with you.”)

Point toward hope.

Now I know what you’re thinking: of course we point them toward hope, it’s kind of our job! And yes, I hear you. We want to point people toward hope, but let me challenge you to be thoughtful and intentional in how you do this. There’s a reason I didn’t list this point first and it’s because we often jump into moments of grief with good intentions that often fall flat.

When someone is grieving the loss of a family member we might throw out 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18. When someone is wrestling with whether God cares, we throw out passages about Him caring for children or a poem about footprints. When people are wrestling with depression or anxiety and are grieving because they think God doesn’t see them, we hand them a passage about burdens being lightened. And yes, all these passages are true, and maybe taken a little out of context at times, but let me ask you something: is that what they need to hear right at that moment?

We serve a big God! A God who can handle our doubts, fears, questions, and even anger because He is God. And one of the best things you can do is allow people to express their tensions and then at the right moment to point them to the hope we have in Christ. This may not be right away, and that’s okay, but it must be a part of what we do in comforting them.

Walk with them.

This is one of the best things you can do when people are grieving. Stick with them. Check in on them. Follow up. When you do this, you are engaging in intentional, relational discipleship and you are showing that person they matter to you and to God.

This isn’t easy. Believe me on this. Depending on what people are walking through, how they are processing, and the depth of hurt, this can be a long and difficult road at times. But we are called to care for one another. To stand in the gap for those who need it. And to be the embodiment of Christ to this hurting world. When we walk with and stand for those who are grieving, we are living out the mission of Jesus.

Quick Tip: Engaging Speaking

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Have you ever had a kid play on their phone while speak? Have you witnessed side conversations happening? Have you ever had a student or leader audibly yawn or fall asleep during your teaching?

Okay, so it isn’t just me (and yes, every one of those moments have happened more than once). The truth is, speaking is hard. Speaking to students is harder still. And being an engaging speaker to students is one of the hardest things you can do.

I get it, I wasn’t always a good speaker. In fact, I took a speech class in high school that I almost didn’t pass because I struggled to simply speak in front of ten other people. I didn’t actually hone my skills until I was in undergrad and even then it was incredibly difficult to speak in front of my peers let alone a church or youth group. As I have been pastoring, my skills and style have continued to grow and evolve as I have become more comfortable with who I am and the gifts God has given to me.

What I would love to share with you today are just some skills I have learned during my journey, my successes, and my failures. I hope that you can take these ideas and utilize them to help you grow in engaging speaking regardless of your setting.

Control your pace.

This is a big thing when it comes to speaking. I’m a fast talker by nature. I grew up in the Northeast and I have always spoken quickly. But when you speak quickly, you can lose your audience. They can’t keep up so they tune out. I’m not saying you cannot be yourself, but be mindful of your pace and leverage it to help you engage others. Slow down for intentional moments. Consider speeding up when listing items. Pace can invite people into what you’re saying or push them away. So be mindful and creative in how you are using your pace.

Utilize your voice.

You have a great gift that we often don’t even think about: your voice. How you utilize and control your voice is key to being an engaging speaker. Utilize different vocal ranges, talk at varying volumes, and control your speaking speed. These are just some of the ways you can utilize your voice. God has given you a great gift and learning how to utilize and leverage it will help you excel in being an engaging speaker.

Leverage your space.

It’s easy to bemoan the space we have, but before you think about what you don’t have or what your space doesn’t offer, consider how you can leverage it to your advantage. Are you mobile, how is seating arranged, how is your space set up, what is the focal point of your room, what is distracting about your space? When you think through these questions about your space, it allows you to be intentional and thoughtful in how you can leverage your space to best engage your community.

Use humor and stories.

One of the best ways to engage people and bring them into what you’re teaching is to utilize stories and humor. Tell personal stories and see the humor in those moments. The more personal and relational you can make your stories and humor the more you will connect with your audience and draw them into your teaching.

Engage with your people.

This is key to anywhere you’re speaking. Whether at your home church or youth group, at an event, as a keynote speaker, or even at a school chapel, connecting and engaging the audience allows you to relate to them and draw them in. You can build bonds by speaking to them directly and engaging with their surroundings and what they are walking through. It’s also an opportunity to engage with the audience during your actual speaking like when students will answer a rhetorical question out of the blue; don’t dismiss it but engage with them. These moments of intentional engagement help us to bring our audience into our message and better leverage connectivity and application.

Quick Tip: Remember to See the Good

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Ministry gets hard sometimes. It can be critical comments from specific people. Elders and leadership making passive aggressive statements. Ineffective supervision. Lack of budget. Students not showing up. Burnout. Questioning of calling. Or whatever else is happening in your life or ministry.

Ministry is hard and when life gets hard we tend to become critical, biased, and we assume the worst. We think everyone is against us. Every comment made we take personally. We assume the worst about each situation. We believe our students don’t like us and don’t want to attend. Our hearts become calloused and we question our purpose and calling.

But what if we stopped for a moment and shifted our perspective? What if, instead of assuming the worst and only seeing the bad, we refocused and saw the good? Now I get it, that sounds easier said than done. I do not know your circumstances nor do I know your history. But we serve a good God who created this world and called it good. Yes, this is a broken and fallen world, but there is still good in it.

Instead of focusing on the bad, the frustrations, the tensions, what if you refocused and saw the good? I’m not saying we simply walk through life pretending like everything is okay. Instead I’m advocating for seeing things through a God-oriented lens that helps us to look beyond the tension and see what He sees.

For instance, maybe students weren’t paying attention during your lesson. Instead of being mad or frustrated about that, rejoice in the fact that there were students present. Rather than sit and stew in the comments made by your supervisor, seek to understand and adapt. Even if you don’t see eye to eye, continue to pursue what God has called you to and find joy in what He is doing.

Budgets or lack thereof can cause a lot of tension, but instead of seeing limitations, look to see opportunities and new ways of accomplishing what you’d like to do. Instead of allowing negative or passive aggressive comments to weigh on you, seek out godly and authentic voices in your life and rest in the truth of what they say over the rumblings and grumblings of a few. Remember that you serve God not man, and they will stand before God to give an account.

Another thing to remember as you look to see the good is to consider what good are you providing. We have an obligation to be doing good because God has called each of us to be purveyors of the Good News and to love others as He does! Therefore, we need to make sure that even if others aren’t doing or seeing good in us, we still need to be doing good and seeing good in others (yes, that includes even those who don’t do or see good in you).

Often when things aren’t going our way or difficulty abounds, we can become negative and only see the bad and wrongs in our world, our church, and in people. But when we refocus our eyes, minds, and hearts on what God’s heart is all about, it guides us back to what we should be doing: loving God and loving others.

When we focus on doing and seeing good, it re-frames how we approach things. It reshapes how we engage with others. And it reshapes our heart in a way that mirrors our Savior’s. This is not easy. Not at all. But when we approach life and relationships in this way, when we strive to see and do good as a reflection of Jesus, trust me when I say that you will begin to grow and mature in ways you have never experienced. Don’t give up, don’t get weighed down; look for the good and trust God in the process.

5 Steps to Picking Curriculum

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When it comes to what you are teaching, have you ever stopped to ask why you’re teaching what you are teaching? Or have you ever thought about the purpose of the lessons as they pertain to your vision and mission? Does what you’re teaching align with the general flow and direction in which your church is going? How does what you are teaching actually impact your students and help them to think about both internal and external applications of biblical truth?

Phew. Sounds heavy doesn’t it? You probably thought we would simply tell you to pick and teach what best suits your students. Yes, there is an element of that which is true, but we must be more intentional and thoughtful in what we choose to teach and why. Let me share with you some things to consider when choosing a curriculum and the direction it will take your students.

1. Choose a curriculum that will meet your students where they are at.

Each ministry is different and knowing what your students are experiencing and what they need will greatly increase your opportunity to reach and care for them. For instance, if your students are wrestling with grief and loss it may be a good idea to dig into a series on the Psalms or the hope that God offers us.

2. If using pre-made curriculum, don’t use it as is.

This is a big thing I always encourage younger youth pastors with: if you purchase a curriculum don’t just use it as is. Tweak it to reach your students. Make the stories and illustrations your own. Update the Bible passages to the translation your group uses. What you are doing is making this personal and relatable to both yourself and your group which helps them engage and process what is being shared at a deeper level.

3. Make sure your curriculum aligns with your mission and vision.

This is a big piece of choosing your curriculum. If it doesn’t align or communicate the heart and vision of your ministry and church, there’s a good possibility you shouldn’t utilize it. So be aware of what you’re selecting by reading through descriptions and content. Weigh the main points and applications and consider the implications for your group.

4. Look for opportunities to take your students deeper and wider.

Some curriculum can be pretty light on content and depth when it comes to Scripture and its application. In order to help your students grow and develop as disciples of Jesus, it is important to challenge them and have them think critically about what God’s Word says and its application for their lives. That means choosing and crafting curriculum that will challenge them to do just that. Pick topics and content that challenges their way of thinking, pushes them outside of their comfort zones, and helps them to think deeper about who they are in Christ.

5. Be willing to make your own.

Ultimately you know what your group needs to hear and you know your context and setting. That means you can discern what curriculum your group needs. But the reality is that sometimes there isn’t a curriculum that works for what is needed in your context. So, be willing to make your own when needed. Yes this may be more labor intensive but it may be the best thing for your students.

Quick Tip: What to Look For in Volunteers

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I don’t know about you but recruitment is hard sometimes! This year we only had to get a handle of new leaders but it feels like we struggled to find them and we still haven’t filled all the gaps.

In these situations it may seem easy to just take the next warm body, but that can be problematic for a litany of reasons. Instead we need to be selective and intentional in who we bring in to walk with and disciple our students.

Today, I want to share with you some key things to look for when you are searching for new volunteers, but keep in mind this is not all-inclusive. Things like meshing well with co-leaders, passing background checks, being on the same page doctrinally, and many other pieces matter. This is simply meant to be a quick checklist as you begin to interview potential volunteers to make sure they could fit within the context, vision, and expectations of the ministry.

Know their faith story.

When you meet someone make sure you know they have a relationship with Jesus and are tracking with Him. There are times we may be tempted to not ask those questions for a variety of reasons, but having clarity on this is key as they are leading students to be followers of Jesus. It is also a good idea to ask them if they could share the Gospel with you so you can gain an understanding of their knowledge and comfortability on that.

Don’t look for clones of yourself.

This is key, and I cannot stress this enough: your ministry does not need more yous. It needs a variety of personalities, backgrounds, gifts, and faith stories because your students are not clones of you. That means they relate to other people differently and perhaps better than they do to you.

So stacking your team with a variety of people with strengthen your ministry and allow for your students to grow and flourish in ways you haven’t seen before. As a brief aside, even with differences make sure there is still unity, teamwork, and collaboration. Don’t sacrifice those things to simply bring in different people.

Look for heart and passion.

Heart and passion are things you cannot teach someone. Skills like leading with another leader, teaching, listening well, and running games can all be taught. Listen for why they want to serve and what their desires and purpose are for serving. This will help you to know the individual, their heart, and their rationale for serving.

Seek alignment with the vision and mission of the ministry.

I’ve talked with many people who have wanted to serve with students but their values and ours did not align. I’ll never forget when a potential volunteer stated that the purpose of being a leader was to talk at students and for them to listen to all of the leader’s knowledge. That individual wasn’t joking either. When I began to share our philosophy and vision they self selected and said “I don’t think this is for me.” And they were right.

Our vision and theirs did not align and if there isn’t alignment that can and will cause future issues to develop down the road. I’m not saying people can’t change, but be willing to investigate and see if there is any flexibility or opportunity for growth in order to ensure alignment on key aspects.

Find people who are excited about Jesus and students.

This should go without saying but we want people who love Jesus and are passionate about Him and who also love students! When those two pieces come together, you will start to see immense growth among your students as they are being loved and discipled in the way Jesus has intended. Why? Because we are modeling the metric that Jesus gave to us: love God and love people. When we do this well we start to see life change happen!

Seek those with a willingness to grow and help others grow.

Looking for people who are learners and want to grow in their knowledge and wisdom is key to having a successful ministry. Look for people who are willing to engage with topics, come to training sessions, and learn new things. But also look for people who will help others to grow because of their knowledge, background, and skill sets. You are building the strength of your ministry by having these individuals on your team and that will help your team better minister to your students.

Quick Tip: Having Personal Boundaries

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Have you ever been interrupted on your day off with something from work? Do you answer phone calls at all times or do you keep boundaries? Do you struggle to figure out what takes priority when you aren’t in-office: family or work concerns?

Please don’t hear me as being critical because I’m not. I get it. For many years I didn’t have healthy work-life boundaries. I tried to convince myself that I did but it took a mental health leave of absence to realize that I didn’t. I used to check emails and respond to them on vacation. I was always checking social media. If texts came through, I’d respond.

It was all-consuming even when I had convinced myself it wasn’t. And for those who serve in ministry, we will often struggle with finding a healthy balance. We know our calling and we care for our people, but that cannot be our only focus nor should it be. Today, I want to share a few quick ways to have healthy boundaries.

Remember the order of your priorities.

You are called first to focus on your relationship with God and your holistic health, then to focus on your family, and then focus on your ministry. When these priorities are out of order you will find yourself out of sorts as well. And when these are left in an out-of-order scope and sequence, you will find yourself fully depending on you, not on God, and your boundaries being stretched further and further.

Utilize “do not disturb” and turn off notifications on your devices.

Removing the interruption of electronics is one of the best things you can implement to help incorporate healthy boundaries. This doesn’t mean you’ll never respond, but it does remove the tension, anxiety, and pressure that comes with always being connected. When you utilize these features, you can be fully present in the moment and with those who matter most.

Take work apps off your phone.

This may be easier said than done for some because it may be a requirement. Technically a job cannot force you to have apps on your phone unless they are paying for said phone, but enough about technicalities. My point here is this: if the apps are keeping you focused on work and pulling you away from intentional moments with those closest to you or keeping you from truly resting and taking a sabbath, that is a problem. Instead, take them off of your phone or at the very least turn off the notifications. And yes, that goes for your work email too.

Screen calls and texts.

No matter what, there will be times you get calls and texts, even on your day off. But not every call or text necessitates an instantaneous response. Instead use wisdom and discernment to diagnose which calls or texts warrant a response, and decide how quick those responses should be.

Talk about and make your boundaries clear.

This is something I wish pastors and ministry leaders did more often. We must regularly and openly talk about our boundaries. If we are calling people into a holistic life-changing relationship with Jesus, we should be modeling that not just in action but also in our speech. We need to talk about how we are creating margin and looking to refresh and take sabbath because that shows our people how important it is. This then gives them permission to do the same. It also helps our people to understand that while we love and care for them, we cannot be all things to all people; only Jesus can be that. What you are doing is highlighting personal, relational, and spiritual boundaries that allow you to create rhythms and margin to be the holistic pastor and shepherd you need to be.

Quick Tip: When & How to Refer Out

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We’ve all experienced a moment when we have had a student ask us a question or we are faced with a situation we don’t know how to handle. Whether we aren’t equipped or trained to handle it, or if it’s due to a lack of understanding or life experience, we have all faced this in some capacity.

But let me ask you a question: when you were in that moment, how did you respond? Did you do your best to give some type of reasonably decent advice? Did you frantically consult your commentaries or Google? Did you pull out a passage of Scripture like Jeremiah 29:11? Did you consider referring the student or circumstance to someone else?

Hear me out: I know there are circumstances and situations that warrant our immediate attention regardless of training. But what I am talking about is referring or deferring when necessary. In many cases this is not just the best option but an amazing resource and help to you and all those involved.

So what are some ways to help us refer to the individuals, ministries, and resources that will help those we are shepherding?

Know your community.

When you know what resources and capabilities are available in your community it affords you the knowledge you need to help others. Consider connecting with local hospitals, clinics, and mental health facilities as well as local doctors. You can also connect with local first responders, teachers, food distribution agencies, and support networks that help students.

Build relationships.

As you get to know your community, you’re building relationships that allow you to know the available resources and how they can best help your people. It also allows you to best see which people and organizations align with your church and ministry. As you build those relationships, you are also building a rapport that allows for you and your ministry to have a deeper relationship and opportunities for help with your resources. Building relationships allow for you to not only know your community but also to show them that you value and appreciate them.

Utilize resources in your churches.

Church congregations include individuals who are qualified in many different skills and careers that can be extremely beneficial to helping your ministry. Assistance may also come from other ministries that your church offers like a food or clothing bank, a financial assistance ministry, or even counselors in your church. Students may need a variety of resources and the more you are aware of what your church offers and who is within it, the better equipped you will be to serve your people.

Acknowledge your areas of expertise and growth.

When you know your skills and limitations, it helps to frame what agencies and resources you most need to connect with to help your people. So take an honest assessment of yourself and then seek to grow your network accordingly.

Continue to grow and educate yourself.

As you know your skill sets, seek to grow in the areas you aren’t as strong in. This doesn’t necessarily qualify you in all moments, but it helps you to continue to grow and care well for your people.

Quick Tip: Have Fun

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There have been moments on a Wednesday night or Sunday morning for me when all I can see are the tasks, objectives, and the schedule. I can get hyper-focused on trying to get things accomplished and staying on task that I just lose sight of the bigger, more important aspects of student ministry. One of the things I can miss is “having fun.”

I can blame this on my personality (I am an I/C in the DISC) or a litany of other things, but I know the nights I miss out on the fun because it feels like things just didn’t work. When we miss out on the fun, we miss out on relational opportunities, conversations, and bridge-building moments with our students and leaders. When we have fun it makes us more approachable and relatable to our students.

It’s easy to get caught up with accomplishing all the tasks and focusing on any of a variety of circumstances that demand our attention. But should we miss having fun in our career and ministry, we will surely miss out on the beauty of what God has called us to.

So in thinking about having fun, here are few key things to remember:

  • Laugh often. Tell jokes, laugh at yourself (especially when you get spiked on in 9 Square), be willing play with your group, and smile often. The more you laugh, the more fun you’ll have.
  • Don’t take things or yourself too seriously. Yes, you are a leader and yes, you are entrusted with walking with your students and volunteers, but remember the relationships are key here. That means while you can take your job and calling seriously, you don’t need to do the same to yourself. Keep approaching students at their level, don’t be so pulled back they can’t relate, and be willing to just be a part of your community.
  • Be willing to be yourself. Students don’t want or need someone who isn’t being themselves or is trying to emulate another person. They want you, and you are unique and special. So bring your personality, your humor, and your joy to the table. When you can be you, you can truly have a blast!
  • Remember who you work with. Students are hilarious! If you didn’t know that, here’s a friendly heads up. They say and do things that are absolute hysterical, whether it was intentional or not. You never know what they will say or do and that leads to some memorable moments that will make you laugh (maybe even out loud).

Quick Tip: Know Your Leaders

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A while back I was challenged by a post a friend had written. The gist of the post was a reminder not to forget about people around you. Now let me stop there and have you consider something: do you see all your leaders? Do you include them all?

Now I know my knee-jerk reaction to those questions is “yes,” but if I’m honest with you I didn’t always, and I sometimes still miss things. Let me give you an example. Ask yourself this question: do all your leaders drink coffee? If not, should you invite them to meet up “for a cup of coffee?” If not, do you provide alternatives for them when coffee is present (i.e., at meetings, training, leader lounge, etc.)?

Again I hear you on this one. It seems like such a small thing, but truly what is at the heart of this matter is knowing your leaders. When you know them, they feel known and seen and loved. The key is not just seeing them as volunteers but getting to know who they are and doing life with them.

Start by getting to know them. Hang out with them. Grab dinner, a beer, coffee or tea. Take a group outing together. Host a leader game night. Sit with them at church. These moments help you truly know them and foster meaningful relationships.

Create a leader questionnaire. I know this may seem a little clinical, but if you have a larger volunteer team this could be a great way to find out helpful information. Ask questions like:

  • What’s your favorite candy bar?
  • If I got a gift to this restaurant, I’d be really excited:
  • My favorite cold weather drink is…
  • When some does (fill in the blank) I feel seen and loved.
  • What food allergies do you have?
  • How can we pray for you?

Make sure to regularly check in with your leaders. Whether it’s a text, meeting up once a month, grabbing a bite out, or writing them a note, letting your volunteers know you care by checking in helps them to know that they are loved and cared for through an intentional and thoughtful moment.

Another key piece of knowing your leaders is knowing their food allergies. I have a few leaders and an intern who are highly allergic to nuts. A simple way of showing we know our leaders is we don’t put out anything with nuts at training, and if we do gift bags with candy in them we get them special items that don’t have nuts. But it isn’t just people with nut allergies we should be thinking about. There are people who can’t have gluten or dairy, people with allergies to shellfish (but on what youth ministry budget), people who can’t have soy. If you find out this information, you’re going to help people who often feel dismissed or forgotten feel loved and seen.

Lastly, regularly ask them how they are doing and how you can pray for them. Sounds simple right? But this is a huge part of you knowing and caring for your leaders. When you can ask them how work has been, how their family is doing (bonus if you know the names of their family members), what they have been doing to breathe and pause, how their relationship with Jesus is, and how you can pray for them, your leaders are going to feel so appreciated and known. But don’t just ask the question, make sure to actually follow up as well. Don’t let this just be a check mark on the board, but be intentional and make sure that you engage further.