Tag: help

Help! I Don’t Know How to Lead Students

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Sometimes in church life we may find ourselves in a role we never dreamed we’d fill. There may be no one else available, or we may feel God pulling us into a space outside our comfort zone. And sometimes, that may be serving in student ministry.

If this is you, or someone you know, let us encourage you/them. Students are amazing and, in our possibly biased opinion, one of the best groups in the church. While working with them may feel overwhelming, we want to encourage you that if you have a heart for students, you can do it.

The reality is that students crave genuine relationships and connection with others. You don’t need to be the cool leader, you just need to be the leader that genuinely cares, shows up, and listens. The best thing you can do is invest consistently in your students by being present, hearing and seeing them, and fostering a safe place for them to be themselves.

So what are some ways you can do this? Take a look at these tips we hope will get you started and help as you continue in this important ministry.

1. Commit to being present.

This doesn’t just mean showing up to every student ministry event, while that is extremely important. Students do need to see you physically present. It also means being mentally present with your students.

You can be mentally present by putting work and life stressors on the back burner and trying not to bring them with you to youth group. You can also make sure to spend your time with the students, not hanging out with other leaders or playing on your phone.

One of the best ways you can show students how important they are is by giving them your undivided attention when you are with them.

2. Actively listen to your students.

Listening is another way to be present. And while we are to guide and shepherd our students, the first thing they need to learn about us is that we are listening to them. This is how we show them that we genuinely care.

Practice active listening by seeking to understand what your students are saying and why, and by asking thoughtful follow-up questions that continue to foster the conversation. Don’t worry about handing out advice and instruction right away, and don’t listen just to give a response. Show students you are someone who will hear them and wants to know what they have to say.

3. Be yourself and don’t fake it.

Students can spot a fake a mile away, they’re naturally good at it. So do yourself a favor and don’t pretend to be something you’re not. Bring your authentic self to youth group and let that person shine.

The reality is not every single student will click with you, and that’s okay. You’re not there to be everyone’s best friend. But students should be able to see and know the real you, that is one of the best ways you can show them that they matter to you. Give students the respect they deserve by being real with them.

4. Have fun.

If you haven’t been around student ministry before, one thing you need to know about students is that they love to have fun. Whether it’s playing 9 Square, hanging out with their friends, playing sports or music at school, getting crafty and creative, or whatever else they enjoy, students are always up for having a good time.

Since your students like to have fun (and because we serve a God who created a world for us to enjoy), we can also have fun with them. It doesn’t mean you have to do all the things, but you can engage and have fun with them. Laugh, enjoy your time with them, play as you are able, and celebrate with them.

Having fun shows your students that you’re relatable, willing to meet them where they are at, and someone who desires to share life with them. And it can show them that you don’t take yourself too seriously.

If you want to dig a little deeper into leading students, we invite you to check out more of our blog posts! Here are a few to get you started:

Leading Students Well in Chaotic Times

Quick Tip: Giving Students Ownership

Leading Small Groups: Self-Guided Discussion

8 Keys to Building a Successful Student Ministry

Are You Asking the Right Questions?

Trip Tricks: Make Sign-ups Simple

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Have you ever had to fill out a form for the doctor before? What about an online survey to get a free Chick-fil-A sandwich by telling them all about your last order? Have you had to purchase airline tickets where they try to get you to purchase all the add-ons that take you through a variety of screens when all you want to do is purchase your tickets? Or should we even mention taxes?

How did you feel after completing these forms? Probably a little tired. You maybe be contemplating if that chicken sandwich is worth the time it took (come on, we know it is). You might even promise yourself to never do it again. You might feel overwhelmed, irritated, and ready to send an email to their help center.

But let me ask you another question: did you ever have questions when trying to fill out these forms? Maybe because you didn’t know the answer or perhaps because the wording of the question made it unclear? Maybe you didn’t know you needed certain information for the airline and the hold on your seats went away while you foraged for your passport number.

Now put yourself in your students and their parents’ shoes. How do they feel signing up for your camp, trips, or retreats? Do your forms and processes make sense? How clear and simple are the forms?

How you register and where you go can affect the sign-up process. If a camp or retreat center wants their own processes used, you probably have limited, if any, control over said process. But you do have control over helping to prepare your people for the sign-up. The question we are faced with regardless of the process, is how do we make signing up the easiest and smoothest for our people?

First, give clear guidance well ahead of time.

Sign-ups are always “fun” because there are always questions, speed bumps, system errors, and human error throughout the process. But the more guidance and information you are able to provide on the processes ahead of time, the more you can help guide your people in the sign-up process.

The clearer the information and guidance, the better prepared your people will be to sign up. Communicate expectations and requirements so your people know what will be needed and when signups will launch.

Second, try keep your forms as simple as possible when you are able to do so.

I know this isn’t always in our control, but when you’re able to, keep the signups as simple as possible to allow for an easier experience overall. Do this for yourself, your team, and your students and families.

Simplifying and streamlining the process allows your people to sign up quicker and easier and it means less issues for you overall. That is not to say we sacrifice important and necessary information for ease of sign-up. We still need to obtain all pertinent information but also seek to make the process simple.

Third, be available to help when signups are opened.

There are always questions and issues that arise when signups are launched. Whenever we open our winter retreat signups I know my email and phone will be going off and our social media channels will be abuzz with questions.

Being available to answer questions at the opening of signups particularly is very important. It brings peace of mind for students and parents. It helps circumvent additional issues. And it highlights the value you are placing on the sign-up and the trip you are going on.

These are not the only trip tricks for signups, but they will help make your signup process easier and smoother in the long run.

Trip Tricks: Leader Training for Winter Trips

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It’s the middle of September and we are already planning out our winter retreat. If your youth group is anything like ours, your students are amped to go away together during the winter and may already be talking about it. But in order for our winter retreat to be a success, we need the majority of our leaders to sign up to go.

Typically we take about two thirds of our leaders with us and most of them have been on a winter retreat with us at some point in their career. But the reality is that things change year to year. Whether it’s simple things like the speaker or band, maybe the schedule is tweaked a little, or perhaps it’s a bigger change like the location or expectations, there is always some change that happens.

That means we should be seeking to equip, prepare, train, and bless our leaders as we get ready to go on our winter retreat. First things first, you need to recruit your leaders to go on the trip. That should be something that is done well before you start to sign up students in order to make sure you have the proper leader-to-student ratio and can adequately care for and shepherd your students.

Once you have recruited all of your leaders you will need to start thinking through training and equipping them for the trip. Now I will say this: depending on how many of your leaders have been on your winter trip will determine how long and in-depth this training needs to be.

If the majority of your leaders have gone on the trip before, then you can keep the training shorter. If you have a large number of leaders who haven’t been to the retreat, take extra time to ensure they are adequately prepared and their questions are answered.

Regardless of what your timing looks like, here are some essential elements to include in your training:

A leader packet.

This should contain all the pertinent information that your leaders need including a camp map, a schedule, packing list, small group information, small group meeting locations, expectations and rules, cabin information, travel information, and whatever else you deem necessary for your team.

A thank you card.

Your leaders are giving up a ton of time to be present on this retreat. So a handwritten and personal card from you will speak volumes.

Talk through expectations, camp layout, and schedule.

Making sure everyone is on the same page, knows what to expect, and has an understanding of the schedule means everyone is prepared. Helping your leaders understand what is expected and what the camp will be like allows them to lead better and care for their students.

Pray together.

This is key for any trip you take. Preparing your hearts and minds for the trip by bringing everything to the Savior allows your team to be centered and ready for what will happen.

Gifts.

Your leaders are giving up their time, energy, and rest to pour into your students. Many of them will spend the weekend away from their families, others may have to take PTO to attend, and others may be sacrificing study time.

An easy way to encourage and bless your leaders is to thank them with a tangible gift. This doesn’t have to be something that breaks the budget but instead something intentional and fun.

Q&A.

A key part of ensuring a successful training is making sure you’ve answered all of your leader’s questions. So make sure to have a time where your leaders can ask questions to ensure they feel comfortable and prepared.

A Call to Prayer, Repentence, and Fasting

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“Did you see that Charlie Kirk was shot?” The question stopped me cold and I instantly felt a weight on my chest as I began to think through the implications, fallout, and responses that would be coming. And honestly, it was worse than I could ever have imagined.

Let me preface this by saying I have strong opinions on Charlie Kirk, his message, and his method. But I am not here to judge him or to question his faith. Instead I am here today to challenge us as ministers of the Gospel to pray, repent, and fast.

That Wednesday was truly a dark day and, rightly so, we should be mourning the loss of life as all life is sacred to God. But on that same day there was also a shooting at a high school in Colorado where multiple students were injured and the gunman died by suicide. This shooting simply got a blip on the national news cycle and there were very few rallying cries for those students and their families. Further still, a politician was murdered and others targeted in a similar fashion because the murderer held differing beliefs.

There is a problem in our country and it is being fueled by inflammatory rhetoric across both sides of the aisle. But there is a deeper problem that pertains to us as ministers: we have allowed political positioning to infiltrate its way into our faith and this has shaped our response and how we shepherd the flock.

American Christianity has become deeply entrenched in politics and we have often allowed our political positioning to inform how we shepherd, what we say, who we protect or villainize, and ultimately how we are shaping the future of our churches.

I am not here to debate political ideology. Personally, I’ve voted on both sides of the aisle, I have friends from all different political backgrounds, and I’ve seen my own political leaning ebb and flow as I’ve grown and matured. I believe it is a good thing to hold to our convictions and allow them to inform how we vote. But what I am strongly against is using political leanings to attack, dehumanize, and portray others as evil.

All you need to do is pop onto social media and you’ll see conspiracies about Kirk’s murderer being from Antifa, Groypers, alt-right, Republicans, Democrats, or even the president himself. And so many of these posts are being fueled by politicians who claim to be Christ-followers, pastors and ministry leaders, and churches around the country.

In the majority of these posts you’ll find corrupted and out-of-context Scripture that seeks to portray one side as not just ungodly but also undeserving of God’s love and grace. To say we need to fight, there will be a reckoning, that the other side needs to be destroyed, that’s not Christ! To infiltrate your political ideology with out-of-context Scripture to inflame an already volatile state is foolish, ignorant, and anti-Jesus.

And the sad part is, American churches have bought into this politicized Jesus and are running after it while leaving the real Jesus behind them. People have vilified not only those who hold different political or theological convictions, but also the very man whose life was robbed from him.

This type or rhetoric is infiltrating the church left and right, and as the shepherds God has called us to be, we have an obligation to protect our flocks from all types of threats. That means we try emulate Christ in all moments to all people.

Jesus didn’t call us to be judge, jury, and executioner; He called us to love our neighbors and our enemies. He called us to forgive more times than society dictates. He challenged us to see people as He does: children in need of saving. He called us to put away our swords, care for and love others, serve the world, and seek justice.

But too often we like to take the parts of Jesus we prefer and hide the others. To serve a bit-and-parceled Jesus is to serve a false representation of God controlled by humanity. To be frank: I’m not about serving a tiny Jesus controlled by us because that’s not the true God.

So what are we to do? I believe we need to model a different way of living out and embodying our faith that starts with prayer, repentance, and fasting. We need to grieve with one another as a life was stolen. A life that God created was snuffed out in a violent and abhorrent act. But we also need to mourn that our country is at a place where violence is not only seen as an act that should be taken, but in many ways has also been normalized.

We must be praying for one another. For our friends and those who think similarly. For our enemies and those who oppose us. For our brothers and sisters across the political aisle. For our leaders and governing authorities whether or not we agree with them. For our spiritual leaders that they reflect Jesus not political ideologies.

Before we make assumptions, accusations, or offer guidance we had better start on our knees and seek the direction and heart of Jesus as we desire to first and foremost reflect and emulate Him to the world. Then, and only then, should we begin to speak out.

We should repent of the ways we have spoken poorly about one another and the ways we have encouraged others to do the same through our leadership. We need to repent of putting our wants and desires before Christ. We must repent of our desire for power and control. We must repent of seeing others as villains rather than as a child of the King.

And we must repent of weaponizing Scripture to suit our desires and political leanings. God isn’t subject to humanity nor does He fit into our political system. He is far above all and reigns regardless of which American political party is in control and which country has the power! That is the God we serve!

We need to fast from a quick assumption, a short word, an accusatory and broad sweeping social media post, a defamatory post about other individuals and groups, and from sharing videos and posts that use Scripture out of context to stoke the fires of angry political discourse.

We are created in the Imago Dei, just like the people sitting across from us and those who have wildly different opinions and positions. Just because we differ does not mean we dehumanize one another. Instead, we should be able to come together and lament the life lost, the violent rhetoric that permeated our country and churches, and move towards a truly Christ-centered response.

Instead of fueling the fire, may we fall on our faces seeking the triumphant return and restoration that only our Savior can bring. May we cry out for healing, justice, and grace as we seek to model Christ to our world. May our actions and words truly reflect the full Jesus and not a cherry-picked version. And may we cry out “not I, but He” and “come quickly Lord Jesus.”

Though I know they will never see this, to Charlie Kirk’s family, my heart breaks for you. I grieve with you. And I love you. We differ radically in many ways, but what happened to you was wrong and evil and not representative of what our Savior calls us to. May our God grant you peace, grace, comfort, and hope in this time.

5 Tips for Leading Well

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What comes to mind when you hear the word “leadership?” Did you feel prepared to step into a leadership role? What does leadership look like in ministry?

I know I definitely wasn’t feeling very prepared when I stepped into ministry. In fact, leadership isn’t something I was taught a lot about in school. Most of my classes were centered on biblical exposition, hermeneutics, running ministries, pastoral care, and things of that nature. Things like leading a team, handling reviews, and balancing a budget were not covered in class. They were things I had to pick up within the throes of ministry.

But as I continued to serve in churches and non-profits, I began to become intimately aware that leadership is more than just being the person in charge. It is about caring for, developing, and empowering your people to lead well.

Most of the resources I gained about effective leadership came from positions I held outside of the church, but can easily be transposed into a ministry context. Today I want to share five principles that have served me well in leading various teams throughout my career.

1. Communicate.

Communication is truly a lost art and it seems to be more so in churches, which is a little odd when you consider that the bulk of our ministry is focused on communication. But good leaders communicate well, often, and clearly. And they don’t communicate just to get their points across but to help them know more and grow in their roles.

Make sure your team and your communities not only hear what you are sharing but also understand what you’re saying. Clarity equals kindness and when we communicate well we help our people step out in leadership.

2. Empower and release.

This is a big step for leaders because it means leading with an open hand and not micromanaging your team. Empowering and releasing your people means trusting them to step out and lead in the way that God has designed them.

At times this may make you feel a little anxious and it may not always go the way you expect it to. But if you continue to empower, disciple, and release your people, you will not only see them rise and flourish, you will see your ministry grow and blossom as well.

3. Embody grace and forgiveness.

When we empower people to lead and give them the opportunity to do so, there will be times people mess up. And it is easy to pass judgement and be critical in how we respond. But that isn’t how Jesus modeled leadership.

When I worked in jobs outside of ministry, we were taught to be harsh in how we responded to our team. We were told to establish our authority and not let it be crossed. But Jesus’s way of leading is radically different.

We are to be servant leaders who model Christ to our teams. That means we embody grace and forgiveness and help our team to flourish even when they mess up. We need to walk with them and challenge them, but not belittle or marginalize them. The church doesn’t need more toxic leadership, it needs grace-filled leadership that models Jesus to our people.

And as a quick aside, remember that this is also true for us as leaders. We will mess up, we will make mistakes. So be willing to own that, to apologize, to seek forgiveness, and look to grow and change. Good leaders not only lead well, they model what they are calling their team to embrace.

4. Grow and develop together.

One thing I’ve heard way too often from ministry leaders is that they don’t need to continue to grow and develop because they have it figured out. Whether it’s because they’ve been in ministry for a long period of time, they have advanced degrees, or they have been to “all” the conferences.

None of those things mean you’ve arrived and know it all. Life, culture, people, and ministry continue to evolve and we need to understand what is happening and be willing to adapt as it does. This means we need to continue growing and developing, and we should be leading our teams in that as well.

Don’t look at this as an isolation role that’s only for the leader of the ministry. Growth and development are key for all of our leaders and we should be helping them to do so. This can be through training, resources, conferences, coaching, peer-to-peer discipleship, coaching groups, or any of the other litany of resources that are available.

5. Have fun.

“Nick, we always know when your team is meeting because it’s loud and you all laugh a lot!”

I remember the first time I heard this and my first response was to shush everyone. But then I realized it wasn’t a critical comment but one that recognized how much our team loves to be together and have fun.

Fun must be an essential part of every team. Whether it’s in how you structure your meetings, taking intentional outings, laughing at dumb mistakes or silly stories, playing games together, or just sharing life, fun is essential because it embodies the life of joy God is calling us to.

Having fun doesn’t mean we aren’t productive. It doesn’t mean we don’t focus. It doesn’t mean we are silly all the time. It means we are embracing the life God has called us to and celebrating it together.

Having fun is something that will not only make you a better leader as it humanizes you, it will make your team stronger and more united as you share life and joy with one another.

What is a leadership tip that you have seen work well in your ministry?

Be Willing to Change

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Let me start by saying this: if you know the DISC Assessment, I am a high C/I. That means I love lists, organization, and structure but I also love people and relationships. Now think about that personality as a leader and you can understand that there are things I struggle with because I’m trying to balance between focusing on the tasks or focusing on the people.

In order to try and balance those two things, I tend to hold to well established rhythms, functions, and structures. What I am getting at is this: it’s hard for me to change and it’s harder still to add change into a ministry that has been doing well. The old adage holds true for me: if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.

But pause and consider this with me: is that actually true? Just because something “isn’t broke,” should we not attempt something new? I mean we could hold to the status quo and keep going. We could look at our ministries and say, “this is fine, we don’t need to change.” But does that allow for growth, change, and development? Or are we simply staying put because it’s safe and it’s what we know and are comfortable with.

Last year I did something that pushed me out of my comfort zone. At our last leader training I asked all of my leaders to do a modified SWOT Analysis of the ministry. It was incredibly encouraging and humbling all at the same time. I was able to understand how they saw the ministry, what was working and what wasn’t, and better understand what they needed in order for them and our ministry to succeed.

One of the things they brought up had to do with our trainings, specifically our big fall training that leads into the school year. They explained it felt like an information dump rather than any type of equipping and that it was the same thing year in and year out, which made them not want to come. They desired community, collaboration, and training and they felt like they were not receiving it.

I’ll be honest and share that I didn’t like their response. I had put a lot of time, thought, and effort into crafting the training and thought it was beneficial. I also saw it from the standpoint of having to cover all the necessary items for the year and these were things we needed to tackle.

But after stepping back for a few days, consulting with peers and mentors in my life, and allowing my pride to subside, I began to see that they were right. For the last seven years our fall trainings were all the same and I could understand why they said what they did. My leaders were right. So I pulled our staff team together and we began to brainstorm on what we could do differently.

We came up with a ton of creative ideas and opportunities to invest in our team and to help them grow as leaders. In looking at our leaders we realized that the majority of them have been through our trainings at least two times and know the logistical information inside and out. So we trimmed that part of training down and utilized our informational packet to give them all the intricate information.

We also incorporated team building, spiritual formation, worship, and collaborative training and team work. We themed the training, cut back on the timing, added creative food options and unique favors, and made sure to laugh and play together.

The result: a whole new training that our leaders enjoyed and we excited about. Honestly, this has set a whole new precedent for how our trainings are curated going forward. But the reality is this would not have happened if we didn’t take a risk and implement changes.

Change isn’t something we should do “just because,” but it should be an intentional step to better serve and care for your communities. Change can radically alter and benefit our communities if we are willing to listen, adapt, and be stretched together. The results will be beneficial for all parties.

So, what can you intentionally change to benefit your communities? Are you willing to take a risk and listen to what needs to be changed?

Embrace Your Facilities Team

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Each of us is acutely aware of what it takes to set up a room, a night of ministry, or a special event. Some ministries have to do their own set up and others have a facilities team that takes care of certain or all aspects of their set up needs.

In my early stages of ministry I was responsible for all types of set up. I was a part-time solo pastor in a tiny church that was comprised of mostly retirees who couldn’t help. That meant I was responsible for all set up on Sundays and any ministry event. Over the years since, that has evolved as we have moved to different churches and each of them have had their own unique experiences with a facilities team.

Often times the individuals responsible for taking care of our facilities and ensuring that events are ready to go can be overlooked. People don’t think about all the work that goes into making Sundays and ministry events happen. We don’t think about bathrooms being stocked, tables and chairs being set up, carpets being vacuumed, doors unlocked, and lights turned on. The reality is that these are just the basic functions that most facility teams handle; many of them handle a litany of other functions.

They are the backbone to our churches and ministries and without them many key aspects of our communities would cease to exist. The sad truth though is that these amazing individuals are often not seen, rarely complimented or thanked, and often spoken about poorly whether directly or indirectly. Typically the only time we think about our facility teams are when we need them.

But what if we actually saw our facility teams and embraced them? What if we helped them to see that they are loved and valued? Imagine if we uplifted and cared for them, highlighting how important they are. That would help our teams, our ministries, and our churches flourish in even greater ways. So what are some ways we can love and care for our facility teams well?

Start by noticing them and saying thank you.

Don’t only say thank you for when they serve you or your ministry. Notice them on busy days, say thank you for how the church works, and stop by their office to share the ways they helped your ministry go well.

Bring them a small thank you gift.

On the cold winter days when they clear the sidewalks and parking lots, bring them some hot cocoa and/or coffee. Stop by with some homemade cookies to thank them for how they set up for your ministry. Bring muffins and coffee in for breakfast for the team; that may mean going to work earlier than normal because most start before anyone else is in the building.

Send them a card or a bunch of cards.

We all know the value of a handwritten card. It makes you feel special, seen, valued, and loved. So why not pen one for your facilities team? Or better yet, why not ask your ministry to write letters? Imagine if all your students and leaders wrote simple thank you notes and you were able to encourage your facilities team that way. What an amazing and encouraging opportunity to help them see that what they are doing matters.

Listen well.

The other day a member of our facilities team needed to talk. I was cleaning up the morning after an event and he came out to help. I’ll be honest: I didn’t want to stay outside to cleanup any longer than I needed to. In central Pennsylvania it’s hot and humid this time of year, and I wanted to get back to my nice, cozy, and cool office.

But I could tell that he had something he needed to share. So I stayed and we talked for over half an hour. It was awesome and super intentional. It was clear he just needed someone to listen and hear him because he felt no one else would. Taking time to stop, engage, and listen to your facilities team will help them know they matter and that you care about them.

Get to know them.

At our church we have handful of facility staff members and a lot of volunteers who serve with them. I’ve intentionally sought to get to know their names and say hello to each of them when I see them. We all know and understand the power and implications of knowing people’s names. When we do that with people who serve our church so well it is an easy way to demonstrate love and care.

Help out.

This is an easy way to embrace the facilities staff in your church. Stepping in and helping to set up or tear down tables and chairs, offering to vacuum or sweep the halls, showing up to help shovel snow, or cleaning the kitchen after an event. These all sound like simple tasks but they quickly pile up and take a lot of hours to accomplish.

By stepping in and helping, you’re giving your facilities team extra margin and showing them that they matter. It does require time and effort on your part, but I can guarantee it will create a deepened relationship and team mentality.

These few ideas are not the only ways that you can love and embrace your facilities team; but they’re an intentional starting point. How do you love and embrace your facilities staff?

Trip Tricks: Road Trip Hacks

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This summer we had two mission trips we went on: one was a couple hours away from our church and our other one was over nine hours away in Kentucky. Both trips were amazing and we saw our kids flourish and grow in their relationship with Jesus and one another.

I could spend countless posts talking about what happened on these trips and all the ways we saw God work in and through our groups. We all know the value of trips and the importance they hold in the lives of students.

However, have you ever stopped to think about the actual drive and what happens during those moments? For years, I would simply hop behind the wheel of a fifteen passenger van and head to a camp or allow the bus driver to drive us to a retreat without a second thought.

But when it comes to ministry, intentionality is key. Even in the seemingly ordinary or mundane moments, we must be intentional with our students and how we engage with them.

This can look different depending on the setting, the makeup of your students, the context of where you are and what you are doing, and what your group has experienced. Today, I want to share with you just a handful of tips to help you make the most of your next trip.

Create different types of playlists.

You know your group which means you have an idea of what kind of playlist(s) you should have ready to go. Whether it’s your whole group together or smaller groups in individual vehicles, creating various playlists allow you to have an appropriate variety of music to play. A couple quick tips for playlists includes:

  • Make sure your playlists are downloaded because there are still places that do not have cell phone service
  • Turn off explicit content. That setting may be on automatically and it could make for some awkward moments.
  • Lastly, make sure you have a good copilot who will potentially be accessing your device for music changes.

Play road games.

These are always a great idea and come in a variety of styles and gameplay. Elise and I love the “Alphabet Game” when we travel long distances. There are other great games that you can find with a simple Google search like these from AAA. These games were stylized for kids and families, but you can easily adapt them for your setting and group dynamic.

Question-and-answer style games are also huge wins because it allows for conversations and for there to be interaction between your group. These types of games can range from deep and serious conversations to lighthearted and fun.

Utilize “Ask Me Anything.”

If you’ve ever driven a vehicle on a student trip, you know how loud it can get. There are some trips when I get back and everyone has left and everything is unloaded, that I just sit in my car for five minutes in silence. But have you ever paused to consider how you could utilize that noise to your advantage?

I love setting up an “Ask Me Anything” because it quite literally sets up a conversation that can and will go anywhere. I’d encourage you to set parameters if needed (i.e. theological conversations, cultural or current event conversations, or get to know you questions) but also be willing to engage with your group. These moments allow for authentic engagement, provide you an in-depth understanding of your group, and help your group get to know you better.

Ask good questions.

This is really key for the driver and copilot or leaders sitting in different positions within the vehicle. Knowing how to ask good, open-ended questions is key to keeping the conversation going and to helping your students grow and mature.

When you are able to engage conversations well, you’ll not only help the conversation to continue but you’ll also get to know your group better. I have found you can simply listening as the conversation develops and interject with questions as the conversation warrants.

This highlights intentionality and that you care enough to engage and listen to them. The key with these questions isn’t to prove you’re right or smarter than them, but to actively engage and walk with your students in an authentic, discipleship-oriented relationship.

Trip Tricks: No Phones

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When it comes to trips, we have a strict no phone policy for students. In our culture this can be fairly divisive because of our love for technology and the fear of missing out due to our comfortability with having everything in the palm our hands.

But here’s the thing: phones, social media, and technology, while amazing resources, actually cause us to be more disconnected, distracted, and anxious. That doesn’t mean that phones and technology are bad things, but it does mean we need to be intentional in helping our communities use and respond to them properly.

While social media and phones may seem to help us stay connected, they actually aren’t helping our students build authentic interpersonal relationships with their peers. They are actually engaging in relationships from a distance that don’t supplement the real relationships we were crafted for. Their online relationships may not be a bad thing, but they are no substitute for the real relationships God has designed us to be a part of.

All that to say, phones and technology can ultimately be distracting and hinder growth and maturity on trips. Instead, we desire for our trips to be places that help students grow in their relationships with Jesus and their peers. We want to eliminate distractions in our desire to foster authentic, Christ-centered relationships.

Now in some ways, this is easier said than done. I have heard all the pushback from parents, students, and even volunteers. But the statistics coupled with the results we have seen (deeper spiritual growth, intergenerational connections, ongoing transformation, and greater desire for transformation in their communities) outweigh all of the pushback. We also implement additional means of alleviating some of the pushback.

Prior to the trip, we communicate with students and families multiple times through a variety of methods (emails, social media, phone calls, meetings, etc.) the expectations and rationale for why we don’t allow students to have phones. We also share the ways parents have to reach out to our team.

We share our staff numbers as well as the camp or retreat’s contact information, and highlight that all of our leaders will have phones if contact needs to be made. Our team also posts intentional photos throughout our trips on social media to showcase our students and help families be a part of what is happening.

It should be noted that while we allow leaders to have phones on our trips, we put expectations in place for them as well. We ask them to primarily use their phones for photos and not to simply be on social media, playing games, or anything else that pulls them away from our students.

Over our career in student ministry we have witnessed the benefits of not allowing phones on trips. Typically students are not excited the first or second time they have to give up their phones. We’ve even had some students sneak burner phones into a camp. But as the trip goes on, students start to relax and become less anxious. They engage more with their peers, they begin having more intentional conversations, and they spend more time growing in their faith.

One of the best metrics for us is hearing from the majority of our students how they look forward to not having their phones on trips. They understand the need for healthy boundaries with their phones and for building into their relationships with Jesus and their communities.

At the end of the day this is a choice each student ministry must make for themselves. I’d strongly encourage a no phone policy on trips, but make sure you communicate why you have chosen to do so, be gracious in your conversations, understand where others are coming from, and make sure you and your leaders are fully engaged as you have your phones.