Review: The Bodies Behind the Bus Podcast

Elise and I make a habit out of trying to listen to a wide variety of podcasts. Some are humorous, others are true crime, many are focused on ministry, and still others focus on sharing stories and critiques on ministry, leadership, and toxicity.

The Bodies Behind the Bus podcast focuses on the latter part of the list and truly seeks to help the church and ministry leaders be better at how they love, shepherd, and lead the church.

I do want to pause and address the “why” for a moment. Some of you may be asking, “why would you share a resource that can critique the church harshly and point out its flaws?” I think rather than simply ask that question we need to look at the causation for said question.

The cause is this: the church is made up of broken people and when broken people lead without checks, balances, and accountability, problems can and will arise. This leads to toxic leadership, unchecked authority, and a culture of harsh management and fear. This is the “why.”

When the church is made up of broken people, we must be striving to grow and be more aware to protect ourselves from falling into those categories as well as learning and empathizing with others who have been recipients of those negative behaviors.

With that being said, here is why I recommend this podcast. The hosts alternate between interviewing individuals who share their stories, digging deeper into hot topic issues surrounding churches, leadership, and culture, and dialoging about how the church needs to grow and change.

These episodes are highly informative and helpful to understand how to be a better leader who shepherds and cares for the flock. It also helps congregants and lay people understand what healthy leadership should look like while providing helpful and thoughtful ways to engage with your leadership.

The stories you will hear will pull at your heart as you empathize and sympathize with the story tellers. You will hear stories about churches and leaders you may know and many you do not. But by listening to each episode, you are allowing yourself to be shaped into a better leader by learning first and foremost how not to lead but also by becoming a better listener and shepherd for your people.

So often in the stories shared, people aren’t listened to and are dismissed. By allowing your heart and mind to hear these stories, you’re positioning yourself to be a better listener and leader because you’re seeing people where they are at and growing in your relational and emotional intelligence.

I will say this when it comes to The Bodies Behind the Bus: it may be helpful to take your intake slowly rather than the firehose method. These episodes, especially interviews with survivors, can be heavy and soul crushing. They are raw and can feature strong language, and as you hear the stories, stats, and fallout, your soul will grieve deeply. Because of that, it would be helpful to listen to the podcast in bite sized chunks rather than trying to power through many episodes at once.

You may not agree with everything in this podcast. I don’t expect you to. What I would challenge you to do is listen to it and allow for there to be room for empathy and sympathy in your heart as you hear the stories. Then allow for that to help mold you into the shepherd God has called you to be.

Product Review: GoSports Gaga Ball

If your middle school students are anything like ours, they probably love Gaga Ball. Our students could play this for hours and keep coming back for more. Last year we decided to make an investment for our middle school ministry and we purchased a 20 foot GoSports Gaga Ball Pit.

We used to utilize some of our older wooden tables to build an improvised Gaga Pit whenever we hosted outdoor events that brought students in by the droves. We longed for a set that was easier to set up and could be utilized indoors. I searched for hours online trying to figure out what our options were but everything was either too expensive or was a DIY option that required more building skills than I could ever have.

Eventually one of our volunteers built us a semi-portable set out of two-by-fours but it wasn’t meant to last. So we found ourselves back where we started: no real options. And I’ll be frank, I had given up hope of finding something that would work for our ministry setting and within our budget.

That’s when my middle school director came to me with a great option. After searching through Amazon, she had found a viable option: the GoSports Gaga Ball Pit. These come in three different size options (10, 15, and 20 feet) and seemed to have a quick set up and tear down feature.

I was skeptical about this set at first. It seemed too good to be true and way too easy to set up and store. But I figured let’s see what happens, and I am so happy we did. This set is incredibly easy to set up and it has stood up to heavy (weekly) use.

Not only is it easy to set up and durable, GoSports also has great customer service when it comes to obtaining replacement parts. And don’t assume that it broke or isn’t up to the task because we needed replacement parts. One of our pieces got run over and still worked but was slightly off.

The set comes with three different types of pieces that when all put together, form an octagon. You place the poles into each of the openings in the net and put them into the upright stands and there you have it: a ready-to-go Gaga Ball Pit. This even comes with two rubber balls that you can use in your pit.

One thing I will say is be mindful that this pit isn’t like one made out of plastic or wood where the ball will rebound quickly off of the sides. The netting actually cushions the ball and slows it down a little. That means play may not be as fast paced as other sets but it does allow players of all skill levels to have a blast.

At the end of the day, this set is totally worth the investment and we will be recommending it to everyone!

Happy 2025: Celebrating 6 Years of Kalos

As we ring in the New Year, we are also celebrating our sixth year of writing and posting on this site! We have loved getting to share out of our personal experiences and life lessons over the years we’ve served in student ministry. The highs and the lows, the wins and losses, and the encouragements and painful moments have all contributed to what we have shared here.

While we look ahead to a new year, we also want to look back at some of our favorite pieces. We’ve published over 300 blog posts these past six years, and here are some of our top picks!

Nick: 10 Little or No-Prep Youth Group Games

Not gonna lie, this one took me back to when we first started Kalos. It’s one of my first posts and honestly is one that I am super proud of because it relates to everyone serving in student ministry. We have all experienced that “oh no” moment when we realize we don’t have a game ready for youth group and our supplies and time are in short supply. These games are ones I keep in my back pocket for just such an occasion and I hope that they are helpful to others serving in student ministry.

Elise: Get Off the Fence: Why Students Need You Now

This was one of my first posts for the blog, but it also is timeless because students will always need committed, dedicated leaders in their lives. It contains a message that endures over time, and I hope encourages those who doubt their ability to serve the next generation.

Also, a good follow-up to this post is one I wrote in 2020: Questions to Ask Yourself Before Volunteering in Student Ministry.

Nick: Quick Tip: Don’t Forget Your Family

This is actually one of my most recent posts, but it’s one that is near and dear to me because I think it’s a reminder I (and others) need to hear. It’s one that reminds me to make a constant effort to have my priorities in order and to prioritize my family.

Elise: 8 Tips for Ministering to Pastor’s Kids

As a PK who has also been a youth leader for PKs, I still love this post. It’s a reminder of what most PKs need: a safe place to be accepted and challenged. And while some can certainly be difficult to deal with, loving PKs well is worth it.

Nick: Quick Tip: Finding Community

Another relatively new post, but one that speaks to my heart because ministry can be lonely for staff members and spouses. Elise and I have both experienced isolation and loneliness during our time in ministry, and my hope with this blog post was to encourage all of us to find and join a community. In doing this, you will find your overall health grow and become healthier, and you will also find more joy and value in your life.

Elise: 5 Tips for Navigating Current Conversations

I wrote this post back in 2020, but it feels almost more relevant now. In the shifting tides of culture and politics, we encounter so much division–both outside and within the church. There have been so many instances where I wish we would just listen to each other in order to understand, rather than assume. I hope that this post remains relevant and helpful, and not just for youth leaders, but for all who follow Jesus Christ.

Nick: Packing for Trips: Leaders

This is a post that I’ve gotten a lot of feedback from over the years from other youth workers, and honestly was a post that was born out of years of taking trips. For me I love this post because it’s a practical way to help other leaders prepare and think through practical things that they will potentially need on a trip. You may not use all of these items, but being prepared is key and I’m very proud of the way this has helped others prepare and succeed on their trips.

Elise: Book Review: She Deserves Better

I loved this book so much, I had to highlight it once again. For those of us who grew up in purity culture, who work with young people, who have our own kids, or who lead within the church, this book is essential. I am thankful for the health, science, and godliness She Deserves Better brings to conversations surrounding gender, sexuality, and self. Check out the post, but even more so, check out the book!

5 Tips for Conducting a Review

How do you feel about reviews? You may have read the title to this post and thought, “I’ve never had a review before!” Or perhaps your thoughts were more along the lines of, “Reviews suck, and I am always blindsided by them.” Or maybe you thought, “I’ve never given a review before and it’s never been modeled for me.”

Reviews, well, they get mixed reviews (pun intended). Some people love them and others hate them. For some it fills them with dread and for others they long to finally have one. The reality is that reviews in and of themselves are neutral. It’s what we do with them that allow them to be positive or negative, both in how they are executed and in how they are received.

Today’s post is all about helping you think through how to give a productive review to your team member(s). And even if you don’t have a paid staff, you can use these insights to help you proactively walk with, encourage, shape, and disciple your volunteers and even your student leaders.

1. Reviews should never be a surprise nor should the content.

I don’t know how your reviews have gone but I’ve sat in several where something is shared that completely caught me off guard. Sometimes it was positive and sometimes it was negative. But when those moments happen it can often feel surprising, isolating, debilitating, and even make us doubt our calling and career.

Whatever you share should be things, goals, challenges, and feedback of which your teammate is already aware. Reviews aren’t an opportunity to dump some new critique or rebuke but instead an opportunity to facilitate growth, empower your people, highlight achievements, and help them develop their skills and ministry.

2. Review the year and set goals.

Another aspect of giving a review is doing exactly what it says: reviewing the past year or set time frame. When you take time to look back and review the year you can focus in on victories and celebratory moments, and you can highlight areas where growth is needed. It also allows you to think and dream about what the next year will hold, which gives you the structure for setting and implementing goals. Goals are a great way to provide focus, intentionality, and mission to the review and to help your teammate grow and excel in their position.

3. Allow the review to be relational.

I have sat in too many reviews that have felt clinical. It’s felt one sided and as if the reviewer didn’t even know me as an individual or ministry partner. That isn’t how a review should be. Yes, there are aspects of you being the supervisor and the person being reviewed an employee, but that shouldn’t remove the intentional relational component.

You should be a shepherd in your entire role and that includes when you review people. You should still seek to love and care for them, to understand and hear them, and to be for them. When you approach the review from a relational perspective you have helped both sides to flourish.

4. Communicate care and growth.

Part of giving a review is being honest: honest in what they have done well and honest in helping them to see growth areas. This isn’t always easy and it can feel kind of crappy at times, but if you truly care about your teammate you want to help them flourish and grow. So even as you identify growth areas, do it from a position of love and care. Don’t be accusatory or aggressive, instead highlight what you have seen, how you care for them, and a path to flourishing.

5. Pray for them.

This is a big piece that I’ve been incorporating into my reviews over recent years. When a review is relational and personal, seek to care for your teammate in a holistic way. Ask how they are doing, what has gone well for them over the past year in ministry and personally, ask what has been difficult, seek to understand how you can shepherd them better, and then ask how you can pray for them. Inviting them into the process and showing that you love and care about them makes this review much more relational and allows you to truly care for your people.

Resource Review: The Pour Over

Have you ever lived or worked in an area that seemed polarized in their viewpoints and the news they intake? Have you ever felt that you were surrounded by partisan viewpoints? Are echo chambers something you have begun to notice are a part of your life or the lives of those you minister to?

As someone who was once very partisan and also a news junky for many years, I found it easy to fall prey to one-sided dialogue and talking points. Over the past ten years I have noticed my views start to grow and shift as I began to engage deeper with Scripture and its practicality in our daily lives.

I was listening to a podcast a couple of years ago, and they shared about a podcast and newsletter called The Pour Over and how this podcast offered up a centrist view of the news with a focus on Christ. I am not going to lie, my first thought was excitement but I was also skeptical because I had yet to find an unbiased view of the news.

I turned on the podcast and was blown away by what I heard. The podcast and newsletter (which are one in the same; one is audio and the other print) tracked the bigger news stories of the past couple of days and summarized them while then offering a Christian perspective. The Christian perspective can involve Scripture, quotes from pastors or theologians (past and present), or even quotes from the Book of Common Prayer. Each of the summaries has links to the full story and the links come from a litany of verifiable news sites from across the political spectrum.

The newsletter and podcast are also short in that they have never exceeded ten minutes, and often fall under seven minutes in podcast length. That means you can easily listen to it on your way to work, at the gym, or even in the morning while making your coffee.

Another aspect of The Pour Over is they have an affinity for dry humor and quick whit. Whether you listen to or read the newsletter, you will find that there is a little bit of humor thrown in to make you chuckle. It is typically done in word play for a news story and it is not done to demean or diminish anyone or anything.

Each of the people who report for the newsletter on the podcast do so in steady (not monotonous) tone because they aren’t seeking to promote a specific viewpoint or utilize emotions to stir the pot. As they seek to provide a politically-neutral approach to the news, they have people report on it who are easy to listen to but not seeking to inflame a certain viewpoint or perspective.

Recently, within the last year, The Pour Over has launched another resource specifically for families with younger children called Decaf: The Pour Over for Families. This is a once-a-week newsletter that highlights a specific news story from the week and provides parents with insightful questions to ask their children called “Read, Reflect, Respond.” This is a great resource for families to engage with their children and thoughtfully talk through topics and circumstances with a Christian approach that may be difficult to interact with. But beyond just young families, these are questions that are helpful for anyone to engage with as they look to thoughtfully engage with a Christ-centered approach to the news of our day.

This resource has helped me in being able to pull myself away from being a news junkie and instead find a way to biblically engage in a politically-neutral approach to the news. I’ve been able to remove an echo chamber and instead begin approaching the news with a better, Christ-centered response. I have referred this podcast to parents, friends, students, and leaders because it truly helps us to have a Christ-focused view of our world and helps to shape our hearts, minds, and souls to be more attune to God’s response to this world. This is an amazing resource that I cannot recommend enough and I would challenge you to check out The Pour Over and see what you think.