Tag: gifts

Quick Tip: Be Willing to Ask for Help

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When it comes to asking for help, how would you rate yourself ? Are you really good at it? Are you someone who just goes at it alone and gets it done no matter the cost to you? Or do you ask others to jump in and help?

Asking for help is not something I’m naturally good at doing. I was raised with the mentality that you do everything on your own because you’re the only person you can rely on. We were the “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” type of family.

Now I could go on about how that’s a flawed type of system and how that very phrase is antithetical to what it means to be a Christ follower, but I won’t. Instead I want to encourage you to be willing to ask for help.

One of my favorite things we get to do in our ministry is host a Christmas party for our leaders. For years I took that responsibility upon myself to plan, decorate, and execute. I would spend countless hours and days and weeks preparing everything.

I’d handle decor, I’d build the schedule, prepare the gifts, purchase and provide the food, handle the emceeing, and of course I’d be the one cleaning up. Did you feel tired just reading that? Did it hit home for you?

When a ministry or job or an event hangs upon one person that’s a problem. What if that one person gets sick? Worse, what if they quit? This builds a culture of personality around a person, not an identity in Christ and that isn’t what we are meant to be doing.

Instead, we should seek help. We should bring others into the process, share the load, empower our people, and remind ourselves that the ministry doesn’t rest upon us but upon Christ.

Shortly after 2020-2021, we had to rethink how we hosted and ran our leader Christmas party. I knew I could no longer run it on my own and had to come to terms with letting go and allowing others to help.

A couple of parents had offered at different points to help, so I figured sending out a request for help would be a good first step. I wrote an email explaining what we had seen God doing over the last year in student ministry, all the ways our leaders had been serving, and outlined the needs and requests.

Our ask of parents was simple: would they provide desserts and appetizers for our leader Christmas party as way to encourage and bless our leaders? I was skeptical the first year we sent this out, but I was pleasantly surprised with the results. We didn’t just have food for the party, but leftovers we sent home with our leader. Even more leftovers were repurposed for our student party the next week.

We have continued to utilize this approach with our families each year, and every year they bless our leaders in abundance. In doing so it alleviates a huge need for that event and allows our team to better engage with our leaders.

It also shows our leaders that our families do see and appreciate them by providing very real and tangible gifts for them. Many families even send cards and notes along that we share with our leaders.

So at the end of the day it isn’t just about asking for food. It is understanding that by asking for help, we can alleviate the pressure we often feel as ministry leaders, bless others by asking for help, and allow other people to have ownership.

Asking for help can at times be difficult, but it is necessary for the longevity of yourself, your ministry, and the church. Bring others in, allow people to utilize their skills and gifts, and build the church and your ministry around Christ. If you do this you will see yourself, your ministry, and your church grow for the better.

3 Keys to Giving Leader Christmas Gifts

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It’s that time of year: stores are beginning to put up Christmas displays, Christmas music is playing, and holiday commercials have begun popping up. And we haven’t even made it to November.

Now we could engage in the debate of when is it too early for playing Christmas music, but that’s a topic for another day. Today, I want to talk about gifts for your volunteers and some key things to consider when getting gifts for them. This post is not a list of gift ideas but rather one that provides insight on the key elements that should go into choosing the gifts you are giving to your team.

When it comes to giving gifts to leaders, we like to have our gifts meet three key elements which allow for the gifts to be more intentional:

1. Personal and thoughtful.

When it comes to gift-giving, what gift has made a significant impact in your life? We could think of the biggest, most expensive gift, but what I’m getting at is a personal and thoughtful gift resonates and impacts us at a deeper level.

I had a student who recently gave me a handwritten note and a stuffed monkey for pastor appreciation month and that gift is one I will remember for a long time over a monetary gift. Why? Because it was the heart and thoughtfulness that meant so much to me.

The same is true for our leaders. When we make the gift personal and thoughtful it means so much more to our leaders. This isn’t an excuse to be cheap just to be cheap, nor am I saying that we need to break the bank. Instead, we need to find a balance within the confines of our budget to give a gift that is from the heart and is personal and thoughtful.

2. Practical.

This is another key element of our gift-giving. We want all of our gifts to be practical along with being personal and thoughtful. I’ll admit that this does get a little difficult the more leaders you have because what may be practical for some may not be practical for others.

When you’re thinking about a gift, ask yourself, “Is this practical and will our people use it?” When we’ve looked at gifts we have always thought about the usefulness and practicality because we want it to be a gift that our leaders would appreciate and could utilize in the their daily lives.

3. Edible.

This one is listed last, but if I had my way I’d list it first (mostly because I love food). This element is intentionally listed last because out of the three elements, this is the one that if the other two are met, isn’t vital to have. That isn’t to say don’t incorporate this element, but realize it doesn’t have to be the priority of the three.

When you provide an edible gift, it is imprtant to incorporate the other two elements of gift-giving. Is it a thoughtful gift and practical? Did you simply grab something from Costco or is it handmade? Did you attach a personal note? Is it something everyone can have (think about food allergies)?

Edible gifts are some of my favorite because it means someone knows me and most of us love food. So to provide something to your leaders that is edible is a great gift to bless them with.

At the end of the day, there’s no magic formula to gift-giving. These elements have served our ministry well and have helped us to truly bless our leaders. There may be times our gifts don’t hit the mark, but this method helps us to think through the gifts we are giving and how they will be received by the people who get them.

When you give gifts to your leaders, how do you make sure they are well-received and intentional?

Embracing Yourself

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We are all unique. We bring different skills, personalities, giftings, backgrounds, experiences, and perspectives to the table. These aspects are what make each of us uniquely suited to serve in student ministry.

But if you have been around student ministry, or ministry period, you have probably heard or assumed that a youth pastor should look and act a certain way. There’s the image of a young, hip youth pastor who can play guitar and knows everything about pop culture.

There’s the personality that’s charismatic and outgoing. The youth worker who is energized by large gatherings that are filled with excitement and energy. The youth worker who is everyone’s best friend and all the students relate to them.

Or on the flip side, there’s the stereotypical youth pastor who dresses down all the time, is a glorified babysitter, and is called on to preach only when the senior pastor is out of town.

Do any of these sound familiar? Have you heard or experienced any of those presuppositions? I know I have in my career, many times. And if I’m honest, those presuppositions can be pretty defeating and hurtful. I don’t fit those molds at all and if those molds were the picture of the perfect youth pastor, I wouldn’t have a job. But can I let you in on a secret?

There is no “perfect” youth pastor or youth worker. There’s no “right” personality type or style or leadership. You don’t have to fit a certain mold or stereotype. You can and should be uniquely you!

God has created you in a unique and purposeful way. Your personality, your gifting, your strengths, and even your weaknesses have uniquely positioned you for ministering to students. You don’t need to dress a certain way or have all the glitz and glam. Those aren’t bad things but they aren’t ultimate things.

You can be soft spoken and relationally-focused. You could be outgoing and a gifted communicator. You can focus on discipleship or have a desire to be more evangelistic. You may have a passion for large events or smaller gatherings. Structure can be your strength or your ability to work on the fly. Whatever you bring to the table makes you, you.

Now I’m not advocating for passivity or to simply show up and not seek to grow and develop. What I am saying is this: your gifts, personality, and skillset are uniquely given to you by God to equip you for ministering to students.

So lean into those gifts, further your strengths, and seek to shore up your weaknesses. Don’t allow for who you are or presuppositions or the stereotypes to keep you from doing what God has called you to do. Embrace yourself and your gifts and allow for God to work through you in the intentional way He has desired for you.

So what makes you, you? What gifts, strengths, and skills do you bring to the table? How are you highlighting those abilities and helping others to see you and your skills as God does?

Embrace and lean into your skills and abilities! You are exactly who God wants in the space He has placed you in. Never forget that! Embrace yourself and allow God to work in and through you as you shepherd and guide the next generation.