Tag: church

Quick Tip: Be Willing to Ask for Help

Posted on by Leave a comment

When it comes to asking for help, how would you rate yourself ? Are you really good at it? Are you someone who just goes at it alone and gets it done no matter the cost to you? Or do you ask others to jump in and help?

Asking for help is not something I’m naturally good at doing. I was raised with the mentality that you do everything on your own because you’re the only person you can rely on. We were the “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” type of family.

Now I could go on about how that’s a flawed type of system and how that very phrase is antithetical to what it means to be a Christ follower, but I won’t. Instead I want to encourage you to be willing to ask for help.

One of my favorite things we get to do in our ministry is host a Christmas party for our leaders. For years I took that responsibility upon myself to plan, decorate, and execute. I would spend countless hours and days and weeks preparing everything.

I’d handle decor, I’d build the schedule, prepare the gifts, purchase and provide the food, handle the emceeing, and of course I’d be the one cleaning up. Did you feel tired just reading that? Did it hit home for you?

When a ministry or job or an event hangs upon one person that’s a problem. What if that one person gets sick? Worse, what if they quit? This builds a culture of personality around a person, not an identity in Christ and that isn’t what we are meant to be doing.

Instead, we should seek help. We should bring others into the process, share the load, empower our people, and remind ourselves that the ministry doesn’t rest upon us but upon Christ.

Shortly after 2020-2021, we had to rethink how we hosted and ran our leader Christmas party. I knew I could no longer run it on my own and had to come to terms with letting go and allowing others to help.

A couple of parents had offered at different points to help, so I figured sending out a request for help would be a good first step. I wrote an email explaining what we had seen God doing over the last year in student ministry, all the ways our leaders had been serving, and outlined the needs and requests.

Our ask of parents was simple: would they provide desserts and appetizers for our leader Christmas party as way to encourage and bless our leaders? I was skeptical the first year we sent this out, but I was pleasantly surprised with the results. We didn’t just have food for the party, but leftovers we sent home with our leader. Even more leftovers were repurposed for our student party the next week.

We have continued to utilize this approach with our families each year, and every year they bless our leaders in abundance. In doing so it alleviates a huge need for that event and allows our team to better engage with our leaders.

It also shows our leaders that our families do see and appreciate them by providing very real and tangible gifts for them. Many families even send cards and notes along that we share with our leaders.

So at the end of the day it isn’t just about asking for food. It is understanding that by asking for help, we can alleviate the pressure we often feel as ministry leaders, bless others by asking for help, and allow other people to have ownership.

Asking for help can at times be difficult, but it is necessary for the longevity of yourself, your ministry, and the church. Bring others in, allow people to utilize their skills and gifts, and build the church and your ministry around Christ. If you do this you will see yourself, your ministry, and your church grow for the better.

Help! I Don’t Know How to Lead Students

Posted on by Leave a comment

Sometimes in church life we may find ourselves in a role we never dreamed we’d fill. There may be no one else available, or we may feel God pulling us into a space outside our comfort zone. And sometimes, that may be serving in student ministry.

If this is you, or someone you know, let us encourage you/them. Students are amazing and, in our possibly biased opinion, one of the best groups in the church. While working with them may feel overwhelming, we want to encourage you that if you have a heart for students, you can do it.

The reality is that students crave genuine relationships and connection with others. You don’t need to be the cool leader, you just need to be the leader that genuinely cares, shows up, and listens. The best thing you can do is invest consistently in your students by being present, hearing and seeing them, and fostering a safe place for them to be themselves.

So what are some ways you can do this? Take a look at these tips we hope will get you started and help as you continue in this important ministry.

1. Commit to being present.

This doesn’t just mean showing up to every student ministry event, while that is extremely important. Students do need to see you physically present. It also means being mentally present with your students.

You can be mentally present by putting work and life stressors on the back burner and trying not to bring them with you to youth group. You can also make sure to spend your time with the students, not hanging out with other leaders or playing on your phone.

One of the best ways you can show students how important they are is by giving them your undivided attention when you are with them.

2. Actively listen to your students.

Listening is another way to be present. And while we are to guide and shepherd our students, the first thing they need to learn about us is that we are listening to them. This is how we show them that we genuinely care.

Practice active listening by seeking to understand what your students are saying and why, and by asking thoughtful follow-up questions that continue to foster the conversation. Don’t worry about handing out advice and instruction right away, and don’t listen just to give a response. Show students you are someone who will hear them and wants to know what they have to say.

3. Be yourself and don’t fake it.

Students can spot a fake a mile away, they’re naturally good at it. So do yourself a favor and don’t pretend to be something you’re not. Bring your authentic self to youth group and let that person shine.

The reality is not every single student will click with you, and that’s okay. You’re not there to be everyone’s best friend. But students should be able to see and know the real you, that is one of the best ways you can show them that they matter to you. Give students the respect they deserve by being real with them.

4. Have fun.

If you haven’t been around student ministry before, one thing you need to know about students is that they love to have fun. Whether it’s playing 9 Square, hanging out with their friends, playing sports or music at school, getting crafty and creative, or whatever else they enjoy, students are always up for having a good time.

Since your students like to have fun (and because we serve a God who created a world for us to enjoy), we can also have fun with them. It doesn’t mean you have to do all the things, but you can engage and have fun with them. Laugh, enjoy your time with them, play as you are able, and celebrate with them.

Having fun shows your students that you’re relatable, willing to meet them where they are at, and someone who desires to share life with them. And it can show them that you don’t take yourself too seriously.

If you want to dig a little deeper into leading students, we invite you to check out more of our blog posts! Here are a few to get you started:

Leading Students Well in Chaotic Times

Quick Tip: Giving Students Ownership

Leading Small Groups: Self-Guided Discussion

8 Keys to Building a Successful Student Ministry

Are You Asking the Right Questions?

Quick Tip: Go to Sunday Service

Posted on by Leave a comment

Have you ever felt like Sundays are just incredibly busy and you’re running around trying to get everything done? Have you hit your step goal on a Sunday morning before the services are done? Is Sunday morning time to catch up on emails and last-minute prep for your message?

Has Sunday become just another work day? When was the last time you sat in a worship service as a participant and worshipper? Do you get stopped multiple times before you even open your office?

Me too! I get it. Part of working or serving at a church means that Sundays will often include work in various capacities. But that doesn’t mean we should forego our own spiritual health and inflow, nor should we give up on fellowship with the body. Yes, there will be Sundays when we are pulled in a hundred different directions and don’t get into a service. But that should be the exception not the norm.

We are called to be an active participant of the church and to continue to meet together and care for one another. This command doesn’t simply apply to church members, but also to those of us who serve on staff at the church. The book of Acts is all about the fellowship of believers and being a part of the local church. It is easy to say we are a part of the church as we serve the body, but are you actually participating with the body of Christ and being poured into?

As employees within the church it is a default of ours to serve the church, but it is something we often do at our own detriment as we don’t participate with our fellow believers in the corporate gathering. If we continue to treat Sunday as simply a day of work instead of worshipping with others, I can promise you five things:

  1. You’ll find yourself trying to lead from nothing as you are not being poured into.
  2. You’ll become frustrated, resentful, angry, and bitter toward the church because you will see the church as keeping you from worshipping and growing.
  3. It will lead to fracturing and frustration in your family if you don’t worship together.
  4. You will lose the joy that you had in ministry.
  5. You will struggle in your walk with Jesus.

At the end of the day, there will be Sundays that you don’t make it into the service. Those Sundays should not be the norm, but instead the exception. Even if you need to talk with your supervisor about your schedule, commit to being in the service (with your family if applicable) and worshipping with your fellow believers. I can promise you that this is necessary and will ultimately be better for you, your family, those you lead, and your church.