Written by Student ministry will always include partnership with parents, and whether we are or become parents ourselves, we will inevitably interact with parenting resources. Depending on the pockets of Christianity of which you have been apart, you may have found some troubling aspects to these resources, or you may have found yourself processing the parenting styles under which you grew up.
Regardless of where you find yourself, The Myth of Good Christian Parenting: How False Promises Betrayed a Generation of Evangelical Families is an excellent resource for youth workers. Authors Marissa Franks Burt and Kelsey Kramer McGinnis guide us through an overview of the history of Evangelical parenting resources while drilling down into specific stories and examples. They provide a sobering, yet insightful look into how Evangelical parenting has historically been framed and what that has led to or can lead to today.
The book is broken down into three sections that ask “How Did We Get Here,” “What Do We Find Here,” and “Where Do We Go from Here”? It tracks the beginning of certain Christian teachings, and how decades later, the fruit is manifesting in the lives of those who followed them. It seeks to direct the reader to learn from the past while paving a healthy, Jesus-oriented way forward that values both parents and children.
The book also includes a helpful tool for evaluating parenting resources to determine whether or not they should be used, which is a wonderful gift to student ministry leaders as they seek to support parents. Rather than simply going off of whether a book or ministry is popular, readers are equipped to evaluate the resource itself. This encourages active involvement in the selection and implementation of resources that can be catered to specific family and parenting dynamics.
The reality is we find ourselves in a Christian culture inundated with messages that are touted as “biblical,” but when compared with the life and teachings of Jesus, are anything but. The cost of these harmful teachings is great, and one might argue we have only begun to scratch the surface of the outcomes.
In order to advocate well for the students (and parents) within our care, we need to be able to identify harmful teachings, provide guidance that honors Jesus and the imago dei within each person, and do both with boldness and understanding. If you need a starting point to examine resources, or process your own personal experience, The Myth of Good Christian Parenting is an excellent place to start.
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